The much - vaunted 'Tourist' Flights to Mars , expected to start in 2030, will have to be booked by Debit - Card only, if passengers wish to avail of cheap fares.
Those wishing to grab the cheapest fares must also expect to be charged a potential 'Explosion' charge, if wanting to use the inflight toilet.
Because the toilet will be located in the 'Ur- Anus' end of the Craft and owing to the Vacuum - Type Effluent Facility, some risk attaches to anyone relieving themselves there - the Non- Gravital Atmosphere of the Exterior Craft could cause the Ur- Anal contents of the toilet to ricochet, causing , at least, discomfort to the passenger and at worst, potential explosion.
However, Passengers of First Class, if acquainted with Classical Literary Reference, such as Gaia, Ganymede or Andromeda, have a more salubrious option: They are afforded a personal septic tank, whose code may be accessed by answering 2 Classics based questions.
