G20 central banks set to buy all stocks

Funny story written by Aspartame Boy

Friday, 15 June 2012

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Our source, one of the elite

Wall St. - Stocks rose on the announcement out of the G20 assembly that all stocks would be purchased by the G20 central banks.

Recent stock market volatility has the elite concerned that they may loose capital in a market crash, according to our source Mr. Pimpleonishass.

The stock market will be maintained at the current high price levels, increasing at a fixed rate of 2 percent per year. This is expected to draw money out of the bond market where interest rates are much lower.

Banks will hold the stocks as collateral backing the money in circulation on a fractional basis.

Previously, the central banks accepted bonds from governments upon which they issued new money. Governments proved to be bad credit risks. The new system will make for a perfectly stable economy.

Private citizens will be prohibited from owning stock.

The suggestion to apply the same scheme to real-estate was tabled, pending further devaluation in the market.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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