Heavy Clown Activity Proven to be Due To Trump Candidacy
Bridgeport, Connecticut Circus scientists commented today on the recent increase of clowns in the nation. "We began to study this long before it was an epidemic, and now that it's reaching pandemic proportions, we are doubling our efforts. We need to find a cure and eventually a clown vaccine" spoke a circus scientist. "The whole process began to break down when Trump gave his speech about...
Read full story9 out of 10 Dentists Recommend Tic Tacs to Billionaires Trying to Cheat on Their Wife
A new poll among dentists found that Tic Tac brand breath fresheners are above and beyond the mint of choice when it comes to creeping out daytime soap opera stars. "It's a no-brainer really," one dentist said, "The alternatives lack strength and...
Read full storyTacos Against Trump Raises Millions
Donald Trump's taco controversy is staying in the news in a serious way, even spawning the hashtags #TAT and #TacosAgainstTrump. Film director Kevin Smith inadvertently started the movement when he and Producer Scott Mosier were saying if only the...
Read full storyNewborns: "We Hate Our Boring Little Hats"
Hats off to newborns the world over who are staging protests (crying marathons in numerous hospital nurseries) this week against those ugly, tight, style-free hats pulled onto their heads shortly after birth. A Spoof reporter who talks baby talk interviewed a group of babies in a New York hospital to find out more about what's behind this hate-the-hat movement. "Those hats are just plain ugl...
Read full storyGiuliani: "I'd Rather Blow Donald Trump Than F**k Hillary Clinton"
Rudy Giuliani's spirited defense of Donald Trump in the face of mounting odds against his success as a presidential candidate has caused some to question the nature of their relationship. Giuliani only raised more questions about that relationshi...
Read full storyBATTL V Trump
We agreed at the beginning of our association with this site that we wouldn't tackle any issues that our commentary could inflame further. As such we have kept away from the hilarious cluster fuck that is Donald Trump's Presidential campaign. But aft...
Read full storySales Of Tic Tacs Sour On Trump
After tapes surfaced where Donald Trump talked about using Tic Tacs before sexually assaulting women, sales of the breath mints have plummeted worldwide. Manny Charenselov, who runs a small newsstand in a downtown Denver office high rise, has noti...
Read full storyPosthoorn Interview no. 3:Tom 'Brexit prepper' faces a long fight
09-10-2016 16.00 hrs - Tom, from Scotland, has lived in The Netherlands since 1972 and has a Dutch wife. The editorial office of the world famous weekly newspaper The Posthoorn (chosen by 75% of their readers as their favorite alternative cat litter...
Read full storyLondon Stadium latest: "We can never go back!" advises the Duchess of Knightsbridge
LONDON STADIUM at Stratford: As the ongoing crisis continues at the athletics track that hosted the 2012 Olympics, even 'Duchess' Brady is losing her patience. It is becoming clear now that Messrs Sullivan, Gold and DUchess Brady are losing sleep...
Read full storyMelania Makes Trump Sleep on the Couch
New York, NY - A livid Melania Trump is reacting to recent revelations that her husband Donald J. Trump grabs women by their genitals and kisses them. Sources state that Melania Trump now requires her husband to sleep on the living room couch at...
Read full storyRepublican Party to Become a Cult
Washington, DC An anonymous spokesman for the 9/10 of the Republican Party that aren't supporting the party's 2016 candidate, put out a press release stating that "the rest of the Republican Party will be hiding out in an undisclosed location until t...
Read full storyGossip Writer Insinuates that Famous African-American Comedian Who Lectured Black People Will Play the Race Card
Hollywood, CA An anonymous online gossip columnist noted that a famous comedian who MIGHT be involved in a felony sex scandal once toured black churches and community centers to help uplift the morals of the black community and himself as a community...
Read full storyTrump's Attempt To Get In Married Woman's Pants By Taking Her Furniture Shopping Leads To Calls For Him To Leave Planet
Washington DC - A tape strategically leaked to the press by the Clinton campaign has led to calls for Trump to drop out of the race. Most of those calling for him to drop out are major figures within the Republican party still bitter that the voters...
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