
Brad Pitt casts Leonardo DiCaprio as attorney Randy Mastro in blockbuster Chevron movie
Hollywood, California - "Except that Randy's way better looking," Mrs Mastro tweeted this evening as the news of Brad Pitt hiring Leonardo DiCaprio sent the price of crude rocketing another $57 a barrel. The Wolf of Wall Street actor will star as...
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Democratic candidate Hillary Clinton calls for ban on applause during State of the Union Address
Former United States Secretary of State Hillary Clinton is the latest politician to oppose the practice of clapping by attendees during the State of the Union Address. Her proposal has triggered quite a bit of backlash from House Representatives and...
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10 year old girl arrested after drawing hopscotch grid on the pavement outside her home
* Danielle Blackburn was arrested by police for drawing on the pavement outside her home in Kent * Father, Mick Blackburn, fully supports police over the arrest A schoolgirl was arrested by police for drawing a hopscotch grid on the pavement,...
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Wile E. Coyote Using ACME Facial Recognition Kit To Nullify Road Runner Clone Application
BILLINGSGATE POST: In the on-going saga of Coyote vs Road Runner, an escalation engineered by the ever-devious Road Runner confused the GPS setting on the ACME HellFire missile, resulting in a total malfunction of the tracking device, causing it to...
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Linwood Mcgill jailed for knife attack on friend Marmaduke Bunker because he "refused to share his Malteasers"
A drug-crazed man from Folkestone who launched an "unprovoked, frenzied and violent" attack with a knife has today been jailed for 15 years. Linwood Mcgill, 28, stabbed friend Marmaduke Bunker four times in a flat in Cheriton Road in August last y...
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Shopkeeper's pocket tissues stolen by thieves
A shopkeeper who fell victim to a distraction theft says he has been overwhelmed with well wishes. A man entered the Bookshop in East Grinstead, West Sussex and asked for a cup of tea, before reaching into the shopkeeper's pockets and stealing his...
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Michelle Obama Blames Her Thin Skin On Her White Ancestors
TUSKEGEE, AL - After being lambasted by both the left and right for her portrayal of being a "victim" at her commencement speech at Tuskegee University, First Lady Michelle Obama, blamed her thin skin on her white great-great-great grandfather, Charl...
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