Despite contrary reports, Namor is NOT Aquaman
HOLLYWEIRD, CA -- Director Zach Snider is "sad" to report that little-known actor Jason Namor believes that he is the DC Comics character Aquaman and that, as such, he is "king of the seven seas." Previously, Namor has imagined himself to have mar...
Read full storyBusiness booming at Rodeo Drive thrift store ahead of Oscars Night
Beverly Hills, Ca - A Rodeo Drive dress recycling shop is staying open round the clock this weekend catering to Sunday's Oscars Fright crowd. Haute couture numbers in latex and taffeta are flying off the rails as cash-strapped Hollywood Z-Listers...
Read full storyTwo Arrested After Jousting Match with Frozen Cigarette Smoke
Two people are facing charges following a fight that broke out Thursday evening at a Maryland metro station bus stop. Maryland State Police said the fight started around 5:15 p.m. between the Suitland metro station and the Come & Get It Liquor...
Read full storyCanadian MP, Pat Martin, rushes out of parliament because his pants were too tight!
CIA HQ in Canadian Parliament male boghole has just received a flash of MP, Pat Martin's rear end after he rushed in here to change his tight underpants! Star Canadian CIA (Cockroach Inflitration Army) reporter, Randy Orifice-Thong, after being bo...
Read full storyBrit spooks in 'Point Break' presidential masks give evidence at Abid Naseer trial
New York - Looking a lot like Patrick Swayze in his Point Blank Ronald Reagan mask, tux and add-on AK47 a British MI5 officer has testified at the NYC trial of suspected terrorist Abid Naseer. His colleague from Cryptography went slightly off-pist...
Read full storyObama Contemplated Replacing Biden in 2012 Campaign Because "He Never Flushes His Shit"
Leaked Galleys from Taking Fire For Talking Points, Jay Carney's tell-all memoir of his time as President Obama's press secretary, show that Obama wanted to dump Joe Biden from the Democratic ticket for the 2012 election because Biden never flushed t...
Read full story