Its Official - NASA is Winning the Space Race!
Its official! NASA has finally come clean and admitted that the space race to put a man on Mars is being lost due to budget cuts and that the 'commies' are way ahead with their space programme. During a NASA press conference yesterday, a NASA sp...
Read full storyHorseburgers are great for sexy studs!
The recent "horseburger scandal" "sweep-steaking" Britain is not quite as bad as it seems because hamburgers make people fat and horsemeat burgers make them thin. Nutritional experts have discovered that males and females who have been eating the...
Read full storyStarbucks to add Starbucks Kiosks inside Starbucks stores
Starbucks announced today they will begin adding Starbucks kiosks inside all of their stores. Said Starbucks spokesman Arbus "Bob" Verberner: "We already have kiosks in nearly every airport, train station and supermarket in the country as we...
Read full storyApple pins hopes on new iSteve amid declining sales and stock price
Faced with falling sales and a stock at it's lowest price in nearly a year, Apple is rushing to develop the new iSteve, which, upon release, will reportedly take over the company's reins from CEO Tim Cook, according to unnamed insiders. "Tim is...
Read full storyNew York moves to ban assault shakers
New York, NY - The state of New York is moving to ban assault shakers, according to a spokesman from the governor's office, Mr. Harry Pepper. "We have no issue, now, with salt shakers. But who, in their right mind, needs an assault shaker?", Mr.
Read full storyKirstie Alley Upset At Explicit Pix
TIJUANA, Mexico - Two time Dancing With The Stars contestant Kirstie Alley took a shopping trip down to Tijuana to pick up some Sponge Bob Square Pants piñatas for a neighbor's little girl. While walking around the market place Kirstie received lo...
Read full storyGonk and Willcock Join Wes Weckler on N.E. Patriot Roster
Boston's Mayor Thomas Menino may be signing a contract to be the new voice of the New England Patriots. As if to baptize the Patriots as they face the black bird team named after Poe's Raven, not the Maltese Falcons. While wearing #75, the jers...
Read full storyA friendly advice to all LGBT
Let's begin with the story of Lot, Abraham's nephew, Book of Genesis, chapters 11-14 and 19, which is as old as Mount Kilimanjaro vs. the fresh LGBT, an acronym: "And there came two angels to Sodom…; and Lot seeing them rose up to meet them; bowed; And he said, '…, my lords, turn in, …, into your servant's house, and tarry all night, and wash your feet, … rise up early, and go on your ways.' And t...
Read full storyRedskins Coach Mike Shanahan Is Being Investigated By Congress
WASHINGTON, D.C. - Many saw it coming and it has certainly arrived. The United States Congress has just informed the Washington Redskins organization that it will be conducting a full scale investigation into Redskins Coach Mike Shanahan. Accordin...
Read full storyObama Proposes Children's Crusade Against NRA
BILLINGSGATE POST - Today President Obama announced his plan to enlist children to march against the NRA. Concerned that children are not being indoctrinated against the evils of guns at an early enough age, he cited the fact that in the original Ch...
Read full storyThe FAA Grounds All Boeing 787s
WASHINGTON, D.C. - The Federal Aviation Administration has just issued an order that will officially ground all brand new Boeing 787 jetliners immediately. Lupita Chuffovich, 27, spokesperson for the FAA stated that extremely stringent inspections...
Read full storyTrack From Bowie's New Album Revealed
Following the success of David Bowie's new single, the iconic singer is to bring out an album of duets. The album includes a number of stunning tracks including a duet with Crystal Gayle on a number entitled Don't It Make My Brown Eye Blue And My Blu...
Read full storyGun Companies Now Forced To Clean Up Mess After Mass Shootings
A new wrinkle in the gun control debate has come about. Sick of the inordinate control that gun makers have over our society and the political influence that have upon our government, a massive petition campaign has brought about a new law making gun...
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