No Winners Please We're Not British
Rubbish third-rate Canadian tennis player, Greg Rusedski, was today counting the cost of no longer being regarded as British number one by the UK's sporting media.
Read full storyShowbiz Great Mickey Tiddler Passes Away
Sad news reaching us tonight of the death of war-time music hall star, Mickey Tiddler.
Read full storyBush Restarts Vietnam War
President Bush according to White House officials "lost his marbles" after the Iraq Study Group basically called the president a knuckle head. Bush, pen in hand, globe by his side told his aide to "Find that Viet Country" on the r...
Read full storyHomer Simpson questioned in Litvinenko investigation
Springfield resident and father of three, Homer J Simpson, has been questioned by Scotland Yard officers investigating the death of Alexander Litvinenko,after traces of radiation were found at his home.
Read full storyPresident Bush: "Iraq Study Group Agrees With Me"
After reading the Iraq Study Group report President George W. Bush has concluded that the panel of experts agrees with his Iraq policy. He assures Americans that there is no reason to change course in Iraq: not that he has ever been stay the course,...
Read full storyBritney Spears elected Naturist President
Los Angeles (CA) - Britney Spears is retiring from show business in order to concentrate on her new career as President of American Association for Nude Recreation. Citing pressure from the media and paparazzi contributed to her sudden decision.
Read full storyBilly's Days At The 'Bumhole' Look To Be Numbered
It looks like it could be the end of the road for the beleaguered manager of Bumpchester Rovers, Billy Crump, as his side suffer another defeat at the hands of St Joan's Kindergarten first eleven.
Read full storyGerman pickle ointment lauded as the new Viagra
Baden-Baden - (Ass Mess): Scientists researching pheromones - the body's natural attractants secreted by 98% of the population - have discovered than an ancient Westphalian recipe pickle ointment made from distilled cabbage water and an indigenou...
Read full storyDiembolden and Walentrenched to Help America Vote (Or Not)
Ohio and (South of Oz) Arkansas -- The Big Vote company Diembolden has announced that it will partner with the Big Box operator Walentrenched to "improve" voting.
Read full storyPlaudits For The EU As Law Banning Pan Pipe Purgatory Passed
Are you getting fed up with those Mexican and Native American guys in your town centre that play bland versions of songs that were bad enough in their original form but are even worse on the pan pipes? Well help is at hand thanks to new draft legisla...
Read full storyCherie: My Plutonium 210 Hell
Whitehall, SW1 - (Ass Mess): Prime Monster's wife Cherie Blair has told Breakfast TV about the moment when police officers from the UK's National Poisons Unit raided her Chambers after a number of barristers' wigs tested positive for Plut...
Read full storyLeast searched tags on the net
The trend of late has been for internet companies to hook into popular words people are searching and utilize them to drive traffic to themselves...
Read full storyNaked Britney Spears Impersonator Sues Over Plastic Surgery "Outsourced" to Bangladesh
PALM BEACH, FL - A singer who impersonates Britney Spears has sued a Florida clinic over the results of her plastic surgery, which was "outsourced" to a physician in Bangladesh.
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