Rocker Sheryl Crow tests Positive for EPO
APP -- Rocker Sheryl Crow, recently admitted to Cedars Cyanide medical center for exhaustion after stalking Lance Armstrong across Normandy, France, and parts of Germany has reportedly tested positive for EPO. Crow denied use of the performance-enh...
Read full storyHumanitarian Efforts in Katrina Disaster Continue
In an unprecedented move today, an Atlanta woman has agreed to donate her job to a Hurricane Katrina evacuee. Citing references from the Job Sharing Act of September 2005, Renee Greene, who has dearly loved her position as a real estate paralegal for...
Read full storyGeorge and Kanye
Kanye West's recent comment that ''George Bush doesn't care about black people," made during a telethon last week for hurricane relief, has caused a major outcry amongst White House Officials. Mr. West has been challenged to a na...
Read full storyMaybe There's Baseball in Heaven
Philip Bowler, nine years old, sits in his modified electric wheelchair with his mother and father, Regis and Agnes, at Turner Field watching his beloved New York Mets battle the Atlanta Braves. Mets first basemen, Doug Mientkiewicz, dusts off his cl...
Read full storyFormer FEMA Chief Michael Brown launches Resume Writing Company
Washington -- "There's power in words," says former FEMA Chief Michael Brown, "The ones you put on your resume' can determine your future. Starting today I'll be offering my talents and experience at crafting resume's...
Read full storyABC Opts For Virtual Reality
Cyberspace and Central Park West---Still struggling to find a permanent anchor to sit in for the irreplaceable Peter Jennings, ABC News President David Westin has opted for computer simulated newscasts.
Read full storyBush Combats Critics, Pimps Wife and Mother
Commander in Chief and War President George Bush stood up to his critics in the post-Katrina firestorm by putting his mother and wife on the streets this week. Calling comments by rapper Kanye West and Democratic chairman Howard Dean "disgusting", th...
Read full storyGet Off Your Asses...and take me to Baton Rouge
Interview with New Orleans Mayor Ray Nagin: AG: How is progress going in the city? Mayor Nagin: It's looking fine. The water is receding. People are being fed. There is law and order in Baton Rouge. AG: Uh...I meant how are things in New...
Read full storyHalo Deathmatch Yourself To The Presidency
Washington (AP) -- Congress today unanimously approved legislation involving the complete restructuring of determining who really is cut of presidential timber. Complicated requirements for the keys to the white house have been tossed in favor of a m...
Read full storyBush is 'Walking on Sunshine' with 'Katrina and the Waves'.
New Orleans -- In a shock turnaround, the President of America offers full monetary and emotional aid to the victims of Hurricane Katrina.
Read full storyOrigin of Hurricane Katrina: It Was The Democrats!
NATIONAL HURRICANE CENTER, MIAMI - Meteorologists have concluded days of exhaustive post-hurricane analysis...
Read full storySurvivor Richard Hatch Wins Immunity Against IRS
New York -- Always a player, Survivor Richard Hatch won immunity from the IRS in the first episode of Survivor: Tax Court. The series is being filmed in Antigua, where Hatch reportedly keeps the bulk of his personal fortune. Hatch now faces...
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