KKK Image Shaken By Gay Bias Claim
The Ku Klux Klan has long been known for its ideals of being a caring and impartial group. The group that would set fire to crosses so non-believers could be reminded of Jesus' sacrifice even at night. A group who was just searching for what we...
Read full storyBowen Link Shock
BBC Breakfast host Jeremy Bowen didn't mumble a link yesterday. The incident occurred at around 8.24 am when Bowen introduced the weather. Distressed viewers phoned the BBC to say they could hear Bowen and he had announced the correct time.
Read full storyNew BBC Sit-Com Controversy
BBC bosses have decided to waste the licence fee on a sit-com based on the life and loves of Jimmy Somerville. An all-star cast has been lined up including Ian Hislop as his deformed younger sister, and Brian...
Read full storyBeckham in Spectacle Shocker
David's done it again. Not content with the sarong and sexy knickers, Becks has been compelled to top them all with his latest fashion statement.
Read full storyChanging Rooms' Star House Ruined
The presenter of the TV series "Changing Rooms", Carol Smelly, was described as "distraught, a complete mess" after vandals spent 3 weeks in her house redecorating. The sick odd-jobbers filled every room with MDF "Handy Andy...
Read full storyNew Salon Driven By Success
A hairdresser whose salon has won a New Business award for outstanding achievement says his success is all thanks to his driving.
Read full storyWhy not take your Christmas tree on holiday?
WHOPEE!! It's summer holidays again --- pack the suitcases, cancel the milk, take the dog to the kennels - big sigh of relief! Everything done and dusted! All set for fun and sun --- But wait a minute! Haven't we forgotten something?...
Read full storyLady hurt in gecko incident
Margo Beckinsall was injured this week when she tried to befriend an evil gecko.
Read full storyAll Quiet on the Moaning Front Shocker!
The world was rocked yesterday by the news that there is absolutely nothing to complain about in the country affectionately known by locals as "Britannia's huge shield".
Read full storySchumacher's Really A Crap Driver
At last the secret of Michael Schumacher's phenomenal success in Formula One racing, has been leaked to the public.
Read full storyReality Show Participant Goes Postal
The amazingly successful and incredibly tedious reality show, "The Jagoff Chronicles" recently got an unexpected publicity boost from one of its contestants. Harper Q. Griswold, of Iguana Breath, Indiana, automatically became the winner of...
Read full storyNational Night Out Didn't Work
Last night during the National Night Out functions, something went terribly wrong. According to police from all over the United States, certain crimes took a huge increase.
Read full storyTailor says 'Job Just Doesn't Suit!'
Yesterday, a tailor in Gloucester proclaimed loudly, "Whoops! There go my pants!" before becoming sombre and moodily whispering, "This job doesn't suit me any more."...
Read full storyQueen Mother: She won't wear nickers, revelation!
The Queen Mother made a firm stand against would-be thieves yesterday when she said that she "couldn't abide people who steal things".
Read full storyNellie May Go Back To Circus
After over 40 years in the jungle Nellie the elephant is said to be considering moving back to the circus.
Read full story'No Buttons On Moon!' cries Mr. Spoon's daughter
The daughter of Mr. Spoon, once celebrated children's entertainer and all round friendly alien, has revealed that the moon upon which Mr. Spoon lived had no buttons.
Read full storyDarts Fan Throws Double Top
Yesterday a darts fan walked into a popular high street clothing outlet and bought two identical tops. Upon leaving the shop he viciously threw them at a passer-by.
Read full storyGod set to 'pack it all in'
God surprised the Christian world today by saying he was 'packing it all in'. In a statement issued today he said he was "not prepared for the media intrusion that being the creator and runner of a universe entails". He added that...
Read full story'Cravens' Is NOT John Newsrounds Middle Name!
In a shock revelation it has transpired that 'Cravens' is not John Newsround's middle name.
Read full storyBoo Boo Bear Gay
As most kids, I was always a big fan of Yogi Bear. So when I heard that Boo Boo & Yogi were a pair I sent one of my field agents to investigate.
Read full storyComposers To Face The Music
Composers around the world are in a state of shock this morning when it was announced that no more new tunes can be written.
Read full storyDoddery Drivers To Face Slow Cameras
Motorists are to be confronted by slow cameras on UK roads after it was announced that the government intends to expand a controversial pilot scheme in Woking to the rest of the country.
Read full storyMartians Regard Earth With Envious Ties
An amateur astronomer accidentally found his telescope trained on Mars and discovered, to his surprise, some Martians regarding him with ties which he could only describe as 'envious'. I asked Mr Jeff Wayne of Colchester what his first impres...
Read full storyScientists Discover New Consonant on Mars!
Last week scientists at Jodrell Bank discovered a new consonant on Mars.
Read full storyBaby Says First Wossname
A 8 month-old baby in Eastbourne said his first word yesterday. Henry Searle, who is being looked after by his grandparents, said "wossname" quite clearly around breakfast time.
Read full storyMicrosoft secures redemption & plans theme park
Microsoft Industries held an unexpected press conference early this month to announce their recent takeover of Heaven (Inc).
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