A MORI poll published yesterday indicates that many UK residents have abandoned reason as a means of making a decision in the EU referendum. They are instead planning to seek guidance from supernatural sources. 'It has become increasingly apparent...
David Cameron put it well: 'If you are in then you can provide for the future - if you are Out you dirty your hands, your sheets, your bed.' This make the case for staying in the EU (Erotic Union). Meanwhile Boris Yeltsin the Mayor of London wa...
European Union officials announced this morning that plans were underway to "leave Chris Grayling" within the next year. Speaking from Brussels, a spokesperson said "We simply cannot accept the endless migration of rubbish from Grayling and others li...
British Prime Minister has flown the flag in Europe by telling European countries that they are all inferior to Britain. 'We don't really like you' he told the European negotiators over Britain's relationship to the European Union. 'However' Camer...
Fundamental, far-reaching changes to redefine Britain's membership in the European Union were outlined by the Prime Minister, David Cameron, yesterday in a hand-written letter to the EU. MEPs in Brussels were taken aback by some of them, which inc...
The European Union is preparing to crack down on the volume of pips found in lemons. Horst Limeburger, leader of the new Citrus Division in Brussels, confirmed: "We have been receiving complaints from restaurants and hobby cooks. One caterer count...
The European Union is set to launch a social network for refugees fleeing to Europe from Syria, to help migrants communicate with the country in which they wish to reside. Daily vast numbers of refugees cross European borders in the hope that a be...
Mount Olympus: In a historic turn of events, Plutus, the Greek God of wealth and money has been ousted after the emergence of Greek debt crisis. The decision came out after a referendum held among all the Gods of Olympus on whether he should continue...
Saying goodbye to the euro, and not wanting to reintroduce the dreaded drachma, Greece has named its new currency the "big gyro." Stefan Poopadoopalot, spokesman for what's left of the government in Athens, outlined exactly what goes into a bi...
After suffering through failure after failure to utilize real money to keep their country's economy from complete collapse, Greece has decided to make the switch to fake money to ease their economic woes. After a great deal of pressure from the...
Greek Prime Minister Alexis Tsipras addressed the United Nations General Assembly to announce a formal declaration of war against all the other member nations of the European Union. He justified the aggressive military action by citing Greece's su...
John Kerry has issued a (somewhat) heartfelt and (entirely) disinterested plea for Europe to stay in the EU. But for some reason his customary shine, polish and wide-eyed eloquence of a typical well-beloved fairly centre-leaning Secretary of State has temporarily deserted him. For some inexplicable reason, the notable public figure in question is straying into the kind of long-winded verbo...
Every one's favourite cognac-admiring Eurocrat, Jean-Claude Juncker, has made some surprising revelations to a famously objective UK media outlet. You know what, I actually can't stand the EU and Europe! The renowned deconstructor of achingly right-wing/left wing stereotypes and mutual antagonisms cantankerously continues: I mean, seriously! This is the one continent in the world where...
Nigel Farage has finally had it with the intransigence of the EU. So he's offering the following nuclear option for Europe, which has terrified sundry Eurocrats and politicians of all the once proud and arrogant former states of Europe. Nigel genially smirks: If you don't give us what we want, we will stay in the EU forever! Apparently the whole continent's quaking in their seven-l...
If UKIP had it's way, Britain would leave the EU. But this would then mean service industries would have to then employ only Brits. Given that many Brits don't seem to want to do the 'menial' jobs which many immigrant workers do, with goodwill and...
The scene was reminiscent of a European Cup soccer final as hundreds of scientists leapt into the air screaming and shouting and hugging each other as sheaves of paper drifted through the air. It all happened at their research centre in Geneva at...
Under a new Advertising Inclusiveness Law, Brands can use other leading brands to advertise themselves, even if this includes encroaching another brands' territory or even encroaching on their established slogans A prime example of this is a rece...
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