VENICE BEACH - Lindsay Lohan was sitting in her backyard at her Lindsay Lohan Land mansion when she got a phone call from a media reporter. Lohan, who recently served five hours of a 30 day prison sentence, was wearing a skimpy yellow bikini swims...
SNP plans to introduce a new pricing policy in Scotland where the cost of food will be equated to the alternative number of units of alcohol that could be purchased for the same cost, have been broadly welcomed. Health Secretary Nicola Sturgeon s...
Government proposals which could see a three-year trial of 'double-summertime' have caused uproar in Scotland after its inhabitants realised the changes could see their early morning search for the entrance of their local public house conducted in pi...
Local man, Martin Shuttlecock, today became involved in a bizarre series of verbal exchanges after parking and locking up his bicycle in the local Co-Op car park. It seems that as Shuttlecock was in store, stocking up on Stella Artois in order to fue...
Post-codes where there are vastly more off-licence premises than there are available school places have been linked to the number of underage drinkers admitted to hospital for alcohol-related problems, a study suggests. The research for campaign...
The government plans to restrict the sale of alcohol to Mondays only. This is in response to widespread evidence that people drink far less alcohol on Mondays compared to any other day of the week. "This 'Mondays only' restriction is a radical ste...
London - The cause of death 'remains a mystery' a pre-inquest hearing into the singer's death was told today as lab tests confirmed the absence of any illicit substances in the tragic singer's system. But the reason why Golders Green Crematorium '...
The British pint of beer is to be watered down from October this year. The watery pints will mostly be selling in the pubs and bars of Britain where the majority of customers are under 25 years of age, though all pubs are to be encouraged by the gove...
Grief-stricken fans of former R'n'B, soul and jazz singer Amy Winehouse have had their spirits lifted this morning after truly amazing reports that she may not, in fact, be dead. Miss Winehouse, 27, 'died' on Saturday in mysterious circumstances,...
London - "It's what Amy would have wanted, hic," a regular from an Arlington Street meths bench said today, "sure beats having to gargle with that White Lightning crap." The comments echoed around NWI where North London's biggest free bar opened t...
Media sources have revealed that the fact that Amy Winehouse had drug and alcohol problems ceased to be amusing the very minute she died. Before that, obviously, the fact that she was merely clearly going to die young, was absolutely fucking hilar...
Every day of the week is to be renamed Monday 1, Monday 2, and so on up to Monday 7 following preliminary findings by a team of expert alcoholic scientists carrying out a government backed study into the rise of alcohol related problems in British so...
If next month's trial period - when all Indian, Bangladeshi, and other Asian style restaurants in and around selected towns along Britain's coast will have to stop serving food after 11pm - returns positive feedback from police and residents of those...
Boston - Genetically modified high-octane potatoes 'mutated by global warming emissions' were being blamed for the illicit still blast today. Firemen fought throughout the night as a 50,000-gallon distilling vat erupted close to Boston town centre...
Washington DC - New revelations drawing fresh criticism of the Federal Bureau of Alcohol Tobacco Firearms and Explosives are emerging in the wake of the "Fast and Furious" AKA "Operation Gunrunner" saga. As we have learned, Operation Gunrunner w...
A random urine sample taken from Sebastian Vettel less than an hour after his victory in the Valencia Grand prix has proved positive for a controlled substance. A statement reads; "As part of our ongoing policy of random drug testing a sample was...
A lot of different communities have started a recycling program, commonly called "Cans for Kids". The concept is to collect and recycle aluminum cans and have the proceeds go towards things such as children's education. Many of these programs have...
Get Spoof News in your email inbox!
