In a bizarre off-the-record interview last week, there are signs that Chancellor Alastair Darling may not be up to the job of running the British economy. In a casual chat with financial journalists, Mr Darling was asked if he was happy with the...
A Government committee, set up to identify innovative ways of boosting Britain's faltering economy, has presented its first idea to Chancellor Alastair Darling. Mr Darling unveiled the plan yesterday. Paul Daniels and Derren Brown will be invi...
In an effort to speed up progress through the looming recession, the Bank of England are set to cut 2% off the base interest rate. Since lending began, the largest ever drop was 1.1% back in 3187 (on the Hebrew Calendar), and this cut dwarfs that.
After length negotiations between the British and Icelandic governments a deal has been thrashed out to repay the £10 billion owed to British companies and charities that had been tied up in the Icelandic banks that went belly up. The British pena...
The green countrysides of Iceland have been thrown into panic by the worldwide economic crisis. Matters recently have been made worse by the United Kingdom's freeze on British assets in Icelandic banks. The economic intervention has been justifie...
It's crunch time on the surface, but for those who live underground it's a different story. Dick Turpin (no relation) has been living in his local sewer for six years. He moved in there one cold winter's evening after his bench was set alight by s...
Shares in UK companies have increased by an average of 7% over the past 5 days, and show no sign of slowing down over the coming weeks. News of this economic turnaround comes as a relief to the UK public, who have suffered over recent months thank...
A important discovery was made today in an ancient cave relating to a financial meltdown in pre-historic times. From pre-historic drawings of carvings on the cave wall experts have deciphered evidence of the financial markets in turmoil even in th...
As Icelandic banks crashed, throwing world stock markets into disarray, Hollywood actress Sharon Stone claimed she had been right all along. 'Told ya, didn't I?', she said, 'if ya go around stealing money from savers and fiddlin' the books, bad k...
President Bush called an extraordinary meeting with Presidential elect Obama and other key officials at the White House today to discuss the horrendous financial down swing threatening America. Greeting the small group Bush said, "My fellow Americans...and any Democrats present, (giving a minute nod in the direction of Obama) because of bad monetary policies left behind by the last administrat...
A trio of poems paying tribute to the top notch job our government is doing. Our Fearless Leader Bush Our fearless leader Bush with brains much like mush let sons of a bitches play with our riches and then when they failed their necks he bailed when he should have kicked their damned tushes. The Ship It Does Sink Captain McCain he did shudder as he shouldered the rudder and ye...
Islamisbad, Pakistan (IPP) - Taliban spokeman Itzkool Abdul announced today that the Taliban will be lending Wall Street $1.7 trillion dollars. Abdul told reporters that the seven year conflict with the United States had been good for business an...
REYKJAVIK - Relations between Iceland and Britain have chilled as British Prime Minister Gordon Brown and Chancellor Alistair Darling are accused of abusing anti-terror laws to "freeze the asses" of Icelandic refrigerators in Britain. Iceland's...
Every UK household can now discover the joy of growing their own vegetables, thanks to a new scheme that has been introduced to distribute free seeds. Gordon Brown made the following announcement today: "We are in the middle of the first recession...
Fanny May Bankertype was the office manager at Amalgamated Widget Corporation. A concerned and caring person, Fanny May directed the activities of Amalgamated's clerical staff of forty workers. One day, a new restaurant opened just down the street from Amalgamated's offices. While the prices were a little steep, the food was excellent and the service outstanding, and it wasn't long before the...
Today the upper classes of America succeeded in getting a bill passed banning poor people from using money. Having invested heavily in Senators and Legislators for decades they now saw it was time to remove the economy entirely from the lower masses...
As recession looms, small businesses and their owners are relying on the Treasury for support. Having sold the foundations of their businesses, the Treasury has been forced to prop up an industry which is quite literally crumbling. Small business own...
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