Space boffins from NASA and universities around the world are gathering in Manchester for a rare opportunity to study a cosmic phenomenon tonight. It is believed that representatives from the astrophysics community will be descending on the myster...
Man Utd's defence resembled a huge lump of Swiss Cheese (remember Basel?) after firstly thrashing the Blues from Liverpool then crumbling and melting away like a mouldy piece of "Swiss gorgonzola" cheese. On the other side of town the other "Blues...
Manchester City last night insisted that their title tilt is over, at least for this season. Manager, Roberto "Boom Boom" Mancini, former world champion boxer, composer, scarf wearer, and fashion model told the press. "Is finished," he said. Bu...
Animal rights have promised to investigate a report of animal cruelty in the Norfolk area, after rumours on twitter of canaries being savaged by a group of rich playboys known as 'Man City'. The group hail from Argentina, Italy, Holland and other...
Not everybody was surprised by Wigan Athletic's 1-0 victory over a rather lethargic Manchester United last night. Or by the good grace with which Sir Alex accepted the loss. "Manchester United were awful last night," said pundit, Mark Sleepyhead.
There was a shock at Old Trafford on Sunday as Manchester United were denied a penalty after Ashley Young's blatant dive. After the match, Sir Alex "Cheating Wanker" Ferguson was incensed, saying "I haven't seen the replay but that was a certain pena...
Manchester United manager, Alex Ferguson has admitted that he is not responsible for the success of Manchester United this year. "It's nothing to do with me," he said. Actually, he said "E now tude wimmy" but a translator offered the correct pronu...
Big spending Manchester City are set to raid the Emirates for a third time following the purchase of Samir Nasri and Gael Clichy last summer. This time the title challenging blue half of Manchester are not after a player, but three points in the a...
The football world's greatest car crash player "Super" Mario Balotelli has a new rival for his throne of "Pratt in chief of the Premier League". His best friend Luigi Falcone is in talks to sign for hated rivals Manchester United. Luigi 21 said:...
In his boldest psychological warfare tactic yet, Sir Alex Ferguson has announced through intermediaries that self promoting journalist, Samantha - I'm so beautiful it pains me - Brick, is to be 'Guest Of Honour' next Wednesday at The Etihad, when Man...
In the face of ever mounting criticism following Manchester City's end of season disintegration, scarf wearing head coach, Roberto Mancini has announced that he has taken the first steps in the process of papering over the cracks with unsettled strik...
We're definitely into 'squeaky bum time' in the race for the Premiership, as Manchester's finest slug it out, and reports are flooding in that Roberto Mancini's bum could be heard squeaking from Stretford, some three miles across town. The bum squ...
Sky Sports viewers were horrified this afternoon when a couple of pundits started throwing punches at eachother. The fracas started at half-time in the match between Wolves and Manchester Utd. With Utd 3-0 up and Wolves reduced to ten men follo...
Rupert Murdoch has revealed how he considered closing down Manchester United after recent embarrassing results, before Charlies Angel wife Wendi pointed out that he doesn't own them. Writing on twitter yesterday he declared "Getting old, was going...
CARRINGTON - Man United insiders have revealed that Man United are to model their Premiership title charge on the team who finally booted them unceremoniously out of European competition. Athletic Bilbao. Sir Alex Ferguson offered no excuses fo...
Jubilant Manchester United fans flooded the streets of Kensington this afternoon after a Wayne Rooney brace secured three points at Old Trafford against West Bromwich Albion. Manchester City were defeated at Swansea by a late goal from Moore, leaving...
Manchester United Yankee owner Win Doe Glazer has decided that the team will withdraw from all European fixtures for the rest of the season. A United spokesman confirmed the withdrawal, which will happen after next weeks Europa League second leg...
Get Spoof News in your email inbox!
