England fan Julio Pavarotti wandered into the English dressing room wanting a pee after the scoreless draw against Algeria. Seeing David Beckham he asked: 'How could you miss that open goal, David?' 'But I wasn't playing my friend. But let me i...
LOS ANGELES - Justin Bieber was having lunch at a local Jack-in-The-Box when he received a text message from his manager. He was informing him that the president of North Korea Kim Jong Il had just offered him 10 million Wons [$698,913 U.S.] to p...
It is no secret that Americans, especially those of the Conservative element, neither understand nor care for the sport which is actually known as Football to the rest of the world. However, there are many avid soccer fanatics within the United Stat...
Three of the World Cup's most disgruntled players have decided that rather than play out their roles in their international teams, they will combine forces to start a new 'Rest Of The World' team. Nicolas Anelka was sent home from the French team...
England chieftain Fabio Capello has revealed his latest motivational ploy to kick-start his team's stuttering World Cup Campaign - he will shave his head and wear the hair as a beard for as long as England remain in the tournament. The (slap)head...
It is rumoured that the whole England 'squad' is boarding a plane headed for Toronto, before their next, all important game. They need to relax and are, therefore, headed for some well earned R & R at the home of 'Lady Godiva', who has invited...
The Algerians had a secret weapon. They employed local Zulu magicians or witchdoctors called Sangoma. The sangoma has to satisfy a demand for 'umuthi' (medicine) to prevent misfortune. In South Africa, all football teams have a sangoma who is take...
Jaggedone decided to research this strange phenomenom and sent his CIA (Cockroach Infiltration Army) reporter, Johann van de Wank into the headquarters of Dutch footy excellence, the Ajax Amsterdam Academy, here his shocking report: Overhearing...
In a last ditch, desperate attempt to save England, a speachless Fab-u-loseio Capello has ordered a top Zuid Afrikaans Witch Doctor in to try and rid England of that ancient curse "Loseritis". (translated in perfect Zulu = Spoilt Brat-itis) Jagged...
Toho Pictures has resurrected Godzilla, and it couldn't be a moment too soon. His newest giant monster target; the wretched, buzzing vuvuzela horn torturing soccer/football fans across the globe as they tune in or attend the World Cup. The deta...
Four players on the North Korean Soccer Team have gone missing. They were unaccounted for on Friday when they failed to show up for practice. Rumors are swirling that the missing team members have defected and are seeking political asylum in the...
It was a night all England fans will long remember after a great result in Africa saw the England national team stun their group rivals Algeria with a performance of real quality in the Camel Racing World Cup. Still smarting after a disappointing...
The board of BP, the beleaguered ex-british petroleum company has suggested World Cup referee Koman Coulibaly as a potential Knighthood recipient. It followed Tony Hayward's grilling by the US House Energy and Commerce Committee, and came shortly af...
France's dismal World Cup Campaign took a turn for the worst last night when it emerged there after game dinner was arranged for a Mexican Restaurant. The embarrassing 2-0 defeat last night to Mexico was only the start of a disastrous day for the Fr...
Medical staff have told how a man was admitted to a Johannesburg hospital this morning with a vuvuzela protruding out of his arse. The local man, who had been blowing his 'horn' at the South Africa v. Uruguay game, had, apparently, been attacked b...
The Football Association has this morning announced that the England team to play in the crucial World Cup Group C game against Algeria in Cape Town on Friday will take the field clad in full body armour. The move is to counter any sinister plots...
After the recent failed attempts by football supporters' organisations to have the vuvuzelas banned at the World Cup matches in South Africa, news has spread of a possible conspiracy to silence the vuvuzelas once and for all-by knocking all the Afric...
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