Bob Evans was recently found comatose, soaked in Mountain Dew caused by the Sierra Mist, slipping In-N-Out of consciousness and his skin a Mellow Yellow. Dr Pepper was called in and has suggested an occasional Squirt of Krispie Kreme for the associa...
Washington DC-- And so it came to pass that The One performed His first miracle on the first day of His Ascension. The Anointed One walked into the Mount Tabor Homeless Shelter on D Street. And He saw 5000 obese homeless people and He was humbled.
The commander of Russia's strategic missile forces has repeated warnings that Russian ballistic rockets could be aimed at various fast food establishments such as McDonalds and KFC, in response to American utterings of missile bases in Poland and Cze...
Yes it is true McDonalds have in fact sold their first ever burger made with real cow meat. Beforehand it had been made of squirrel, hedgehog and the occasional koala bear but finally cows were culled for meat instead of fun. When a local man...
After being rebuffed for calling Barack Obama 'a nigger whose nuts should be cut off', Jesse Jackson, once the U.S.'s MegaBlack Leader has had to find another outlet for his giant ego. He's already rich from his Rainbow Coaltion, but getting the 'Dea...
Los Angeles CA, August 11, 2008: Officers of the LAPD raided Harry's Colossal Burger Emporium on Vine Street tonight. This fast food restaurant is illegal and must close in accordance with a newly passed LA City Council resolution. Activist Libera...
Machias, Me./ AP - In keeping with their regional marketing plans, a Machias, Me. McDonnalds has been authorized to test market their new breakfast sandwich, The Puffin McMuffin. Machias's Seal Island has been a natural habitat for the colorful on...
In a dramatic move announced today, burger chain McDonalds, famed for its yellow arch logo and too-happy clown, has decided to start selling real food.
The infamous hamburger thief, known on the streets as "The Hamburglar," was finally tracked down and arrested, late Saturday night, in what was initially a mere traffic stop in suburban New York.
Health conscious food chain Subway has admitted that most of its food range consists of nothing more than "bland common or garden salad."...
(McDonaldland, OH) - Facing concerns that their food is just too healthy, fast food giant McDonald's has banned sliced tomatoes from all sandwiches. As a replacement, extra servings of human lard will be added to all products, including soft dri...
The Chief Executive @ McD's told shareholders that the string potatoes known as French Fries (pomme de terre frite) are now prepared in a different cooking oil, with no transfats at all, throughout the USA.
Online auction giant eBay announced today that it is going to try it's hand at the fast food restaurant business. The appropriately named "e-Burger" franchise, is scheduled for it's grand opening later this month.
From October, it will be an offence for shops and Supermarkets to sell confectionary that is displayed below 6 feet as the Government attempts to reduce the rising obesity figures, particularly in children.
Arby's, a division of Triarc, purchased the Wendy's fast food chain for over $2.3 billion. This was their third attempt to buy the hamburger company founded by the late Dave Thomas and named for his daughter.
A 95 year old Dundonian has slammed American company McDonalds for selling 'McJeelyPieces' in all of it's Scottish Outlets.
ATLANTA (FMLiveWire) - Food and fuel riots have come to the United States as local gas stations here raised a gallon of non-leaded gasoline to $200 per gallon while the price of top of the line hamburgers at McDonalds skyrocketed to $500 each.
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