Washington, DC - With recent tobacco legislation banning the sale of flavored cigarettes and labels advertising cigarettes as 'light,' many are asking why menthol cigarettes were excluded from these new restrictions. Leading a protest outside the Was...
WASHINGTON, DC - Capitol Hill insiders report that Senator Dick Durbin (D-IL) will get a B-1B Stealth Bomber for personal use, in exchange for his vote in support of Obama's Health Bill. Senator Durbin is very excited, and was overheard saying "with...
WASHINGTON, DC - After extensive discussion on the Health Care Bill, Harry Reid has announced that "everything everyone wants" will be in the final legislation. By using "triggers" and vague nonexistent government positions and committees to dete...
At first it was regarded as a silly joke. A punchline around the cocktail circuit, "ain't never going to happen." But the Brazilian Male Wax Law gained sufficient support in both houses of Congress, to catapult into law as an amendment attached to th...
In a fleeting moment of sanity on Capital Hill today President Obama addressed Congress giving instructions for the up coming budget. Obama stressed that the federal government must do the same as the American people are having to do in these difficu...
In response to mostly unheard outrage in the environmental sector, the U.S. Congress proposed a method to reduce the nation's carbon footprint by more than 20% in the next 2 years. The plan is ingeniously simple, and has a 100% chance of success i...
WASHINGTON, D.C. - Cindy Crawford's announcement that she has a recipe to keep husbands from cheating on their wives has created quite a buzz in Washington, D.C., said a source. The supermodel claimed that hiring a housekeeper "give[s] overworked...
The Obama Health Care Plan, which is set for a Congressional Vote after the end of summer vacations, is over 1500 pages long and is written in very small print size technical legalesse. Researchers at the Houston School of Linguistics, however, have...
Washington DC: President Obama has signed the Omnibus Livestock Rights Bill. This bill protects beef cattle, pigs and chickens, from undue harm until they reach your plate at the dinner table. PETA members and other animal rights groups lobbied bo...
Washington DC: Congress has recognized July 22 as National Chicken Day, as the USA and every other culture in the world have relied on the chicken for sustenance. Yet this bird is always the butt of fowl jokes. Colonel Sanders is to host the festi...
(New York-NY) "The New York Times" published an editor's note this week stating pictures used in the paper's Sunday Magazine photo essay were digitally manipulated. The pictorial was shot by Portuguese photographer Edgar Martins, and called "Ruins o...
AT & T say they may go to only the telephone part of their company unless congress approves their request for help for their sinking telegraph division. "Both the Congo and Somalia say they are interested in purchasing the telegraph division b...
Washington, D.C. - In response to Rep. Spencer Bachus (R-Ala.), who claims to have a list of 17 socialists in congress, Speaker of the House Nancy Pelosi (D-CA) announced that she has compiled a list of 178 clinically insane members of congress. Alth...
The United States Congress has announced that the millions in AIG bonus money that they had returned from AIG executives will be sent to Washington. The money will be evenly split between the 435 Representatives and 100 Senators as a bonus for their...
Congress has passed a bill which will standardize the siren tones used by emergency services across the county for the first time. Rather than use the common Whoop and Wail style siren, a two-tone siren similar to the old sirens used in the UK and p...
Doors are kept locked and congressional staff members are afraid to travel the halls of congress alone for fear of being attacked by vicious monkeys first set free here after the 1948 filming of the movie, "Tarzan Goes to Congress". "once upon a...
Not to be outdone by other religious or cultural new-year events, congress will vote today on a formal declaration and an amendment to the U.S. Constitution, citing June 20 of each Gregorian calendar year as the new, formal, "American New Year". W...
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