With current sponsors running away from Rush Limbaugh thanks to his latest flap unfairly targeting one woman who appeared in front of congress, Rush Limbaugh's publicist is running just as fast to find a new series of sponsors. Without many option...
A leaked copy of George Osborne's draft Budget for next year has been found abandoned on a Virgin train travelling from his constituency in Manchester. The draft budget has been graded by an as-yet-unnamed economics professor, notable by the heavy...
London - Tory Party co-chair and smug little homophobe Baroness Warsi's Pope-schmoozing trip was hailed a triumph in Rome today. Her taxpayer-funded two-day freebie has blamed 'militant secularisation' for the UK's ills in a smoke 'n' mirrors char...
The famous No Hosptitals Scheme (NHS) is now considered safe with the Tories. 'People should be looked after at home by private companies who can make a profit and boost the economy' declared David Cameron as Backbenchers cheered 'You always get a...
"Beautiful by Nature, Fucked by Sticky Micky!" As is said about the Turks and Caicos Islands, still seething and reeling in the hands of British control after it's government was brought down by corruption more than 2 years ago. Death of a Nation!...
In a surprise move that surprised nobody, the Prime Minister has confirmed that George Osborne is to be split into two. The move is expected to significantly strengthen the UK's economic fortunes, while also confirming once and for all whether the Ch...
Tory MP Gerald McFisty of Chipping Sodbury resigned today following his public humiliation after being caught in an intimate pose at the weekend. A hotel worker opened the door to his room to find him naked except for women's underwear, a gimp ma...
Chief Secretary of the Treasury, Danny Alexander, has today confirmed that he has been asked to officially change his middle name from "Grain" to the more commonly used "Fucking". "It's true," said Alexander himself, whilst straightening George Os...
A gang of robbers, stormed the Bank of England yesterday, and demanded staff deposit thirty billion Euros into its safes. Brandishing sawn off water pistols and stink bombs, the gang burst into the foyer of the bank, squirting customers and securi...
Magic FM Dj Neil "Foxy" Fox has been forced to resign from his job as Defence Secretary today amid allegations about his inappropriate relationship with friend and advisor Verity Adam. Prime Minister David Cameroon acted quickly to appoint a replacem...
In a statement outside 10 Downing Street, Magic FM DJ and coalition Defence secretary Doctor Neil "Foxy" Fox said: "I want to apologise. I should not have allowed personal loyalty to a friend interfere with my duties as a Minister. I have spoken a...
Following David Cameron's passionate pleas at the Tory Conference, party leaders have come up with a way to instil 'can-do optimism' and 'bulldog spirit' into the British people: by re-enacting the Blitz. In order to achieve the Government's targe...
Conservative Minister's idea to improve numeracy and literacy! Pupils who fail to get decent GCSEs in maths and English should keep studying for new subjects, ministers have announced this morning. The move follows complaints from the business...
My wife responded to the offer from the Tories to stand beside David Cameron and smile at the camera for just £100. However she was swindled in another broken Tory promise when the Managers would only pay her £50, because she didn't laugh at Cameron'...
Theresa May has been found trapped inside a wheelie bin in Westminster, just 24 hours after her Tory Party Conference speech. The meanie Tory says she was dumped in the bin by a six foot Cat. But Cat lovers have said they don't believe this. Th...
Manchester - A rather flea-bitten mog with iffy ratting credentials is all that stands between David Cameron and immediate repatriation Home Secretary Theresa May has told the Conservative Conference. The 60-something politician - known as Cat Wom...
London - A hush-hush meeting of UK energy providers has warned that draconian tariff increases in householders' heating bills are being deliberately thwarted by freakish weather conditions. Price increases of up to 19% had been targetted for the a...
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