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Funny satire stories about Anorexia

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Funny story: The Reason Celine Dion Had To Cancel Her Concert Tours of Japan, Portugal, Bolivia, and Pisagovia

The Reason Celine Dion Had To Cancel Her Concert Tours of Japan, Portugal, Bolivia, and Pisagovia

NEW YORK CITY - (Satire News) - One of the greatest singers of all time, has just sadly informed the news media that she is having to cancel her upcoming "Singing Up A Storm To The Fantabulous Songs of Celine Dion World Concert Tour." The 54-year-…

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Funny story: Celine Dion Is Asked To Be The Poster Woman For Adult Female Anorexia Nervosa

Celine Dion Is Asked To Be The Poster Woman For Adult Female Anorexia Nervosa

LAS VEGAS - (Satire News) - The Alpha Beta News Agency has just revealed that the American Federation of Adult Female Anorexia Nervosa has contacted famed singer Celine Dion about becoming the official spokeswoman for the dreaded disease. ABNA wri…

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Funny story: Celine Dion Down To 81 Pounds Insists She Is Not Anorexic

Celine Dion Down To 81 Pounds Insists She Is Not Anorexic

LAS VEGAS – (Entertainment Satire) – Close friends of songstress Celine Dion are extremely worried about her, as she has dipped down to a skinny-as-hell 81 pounds. A member of her Las Vegas band, who begged not to have his name released, said that…

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Funny story: Marjorie Taylor Greene Says That She Is Not As Anorexic As She Looks

Marjorie Taylor Greene Says That She Is Not As Anorexic As She Looks

WASHINGTON, D.C. – (Satire News) – Many of Marjorie Taylor Greene’s fellow congressmen and congresswomen have commented that she is looking horribly anorexic, and on top of that she is starting to emit a certain type of body odor, that is native to t…

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Funny story: Celine Dion Says She’s Down to 67 Pounds

Celine Dion Says She’s Down to 67 Pounds

LAS VEGAS – (Celebrity Satire) – Celine Dion has just admitted that, yes, it’s true, she is now down to 67 pounds. The Canadian songbird remarked that she has been border-line anorexic since 2007, and just since September, she has become totally a…

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Funny story: Chris Christie Wages War on Anorexia

Chris Christie Wages War on Anorexia

Some say that embattled New Jersey Governor has bitten off more than he can chew with his growing bridge scandal while some of his closest allies in Trenton have rallied around him and decided that he should go on the offensive by waging a war that h...

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Funny story: Anorexic Patients to Be Force Fed…To Crocodiles

Anorexic Patients to Be Force Fed…To Crocodiles

Exasperated doctors are getting tough on anorexic patients in New South Wales. Physicians at Cairns General Hospital have come up with a new way of dealing with anorexic patients who refuse to eat; they themselves will become food in a new tough l...

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Funny story: Research shows 100% of Americans will be Anorexic or Obese by 2020

Research shows 100% of Americans will be Anorexic or Obese by 2020

Boston, Mass-- A group of researchers at Boston College recently concluded that 100% of all Americans will either be obese or anorexic by 2020. Lead researcher Dillon Hardwick stated, "I got the idea for the study after I noticed everyone attending...

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Funny story: Demi Lovato Is Simply Ecstatic About Her Upcoming Concert Tour

Demi Lovato Is Simply Ecstatic About Her Upcoming Concert Tour

VENICE BEACH - Demi Lovato spent the day after her 19th birthday walking quietly along the shore at Venice Beach in a bathing suit she had received as a birthday present from her two best friends Selena Gomez and Justin Bieber. Lovato, who spent t...

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Funny story: LeAnn Rimes Has Gotten So Damn Skinny Her Husband Can Use Her As A Swizzle Stick To Stir His Drinks

LeAnn Rimes Has Gotten So Damn Skinny Her Husband Can Use Her As A Swizzle Stick To Stir His Drinks

CABO SAN LUCAS, Mexico - Okay, when country singer LeAnn Rimes was weighing 78 that was thin, but now that she has gotten down to 63, that is just downright skinny as hell. And it appears that Rimes definitely has all of the earmarks of being anor...

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Funny story: Worst Feared for Anorexic Teen Following Toilet Flush Tragedy

Worst Feared for Anorexic Teen Following Toilet Flush Tragedy

Glastonbury man, Robin Tripp was today woefully counting the cost of a night on the town, following which, he inadvertently flushed his thirteen year old anorexic daughter down the toilet. A senior police officer described the circumstances as a t...

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Funny story: LeAnn Rimes Wants Everyone To Know That Just Because She Is Down To 63 Pounds Does Not Mean She Is Anorexic

LeAnn Rimes Wants Everyone To Know That Just Because She Is Down To 63 Pounds Does Not Mean She Is Anorexic

NASHVILLE - Two weeks ago LeAnn Rimes was weighing 78 pounds and she looked anorexic then. Today she is down to 63 pounds and she looks even more anorexic now. But the 28-year-old country singer who has just about managed to shed her reputation fo...

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Funny story: Unemployed empty heir-head Kate parades her skeletal remains

Unemployed empty heir-head Kate parades her skeletal remains

London - A Kings Road shopping expedition has seen Kate Middleton invest in falsies to insert under her bridal gown following a public outcry about her emaciated form. "If she was a Dartmoor pony there'd be an outcry to the RSPCA," a worried Whors...

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Funny story: Why is the wearing of a veil considered so 'bad' by some people that they want it banned?

Why is the wearing of a veil considered so 'bad' by some people that they want it banned?

It is difficult to believe, in this day and age, that women are not allowed to dress the way they wish when it comes to covering their heads and/or wearing a veil. It is their choice for the most part, according to articles in the British newspapers. It would be much more appreciated, by many folk, if the 'clothes police' banned the outfits that some girls and women wear which show far too m...

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Funny story: Five year old anorexic girl sues all newspapers

Five year old anorexic girl sues all newspapers

Trouble is brewing in the world of newspapers and related print media, that could spell disaster and a possible end to all printed newspapers unless they sign a pledge to undertake a new ethical code of reporting conduct. A five year old anorexic...

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Funny story: John Prescott in Stunning Anorexia Revelations

John Prescott in Stunning Anorexia Revelations

British politics was rocked today following shock revelations by New New Labour apparatchik's that for the last 40 years; John Prescott has been wearing a fat suit and high-tech prosthetics designed by NASA to disguise the fact that he is actually an...

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Funny story: Anorexics Lindsay Lohan and Calista Flockhart to star in Celebrity Biggest Loser

Anorexics Lindsay Lohan and Calista Flockhart to star in Celebrity Biggest Loser

The Biggest Loser, Celebrity Edition has signed two noted actresses to appear in their upcoming season. Movie actress Lindsay Lohan and television actress Calista Flockhart will appear on episodes to begin televising in March. These actresses hav...

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