William Hague - My Fake Diary

Sunday, 25 December 2011

My beloved wife Ffion has gone on a Barclay's bank Advisor's freebie holiday to Fiji, my assistants Damian, Lucien, and Nigella have gone to join the Occupy Miami Group for the day, all of the domestic staff have been given the day off until 1800hrs, but the new cook Dominic has stayed to feed me food, and play with my foibles, bless him.
He's got me some Harrod's Manicure Vouchers for Christmas, and I've got some hot tackle for him!

I suppose I should try and create some believable lies about the country's prospects for the New Year soon. My offshore accounts are doing well, as are my shares in Abdul's Saudi Oil pipeline, and so I should be alright for the next ten years or so with them alone.

I hope the Chauffeur is not late tonight to pick me up for the Tory party piss up.