Tom Cruise - My Fake Diary

Monday, 10 April 2006

I've been thinking of naming the kid "Mapother". Seriously. Why on Earth did I ever change MY name? Also, the neighbors are angry again. They're complaining, saying I use my home as a brothel when nobody's around. Don't know why they're saying that. I offered them all one free night, but NO, they won't shut up. Maybe if I offered them a night with someone other than me they might shut up.