Susan Boyle - My Fake Diary

Wednesday, 18 April 2012

Had to call the police after my former gardener tried to harass me.

The 22 year old lad was banging on my door. He was taken to hospital in West Lothian, Scotland, and said he had wanted help after accidentally overdosing on pills.

Last year he tried to charge me £500 to mow my lawn and wanted payment upfront. After that, I never saw him for six weeks. He replied the weather was too 'airy fairy' and he would come back the following week.

When he finally mowed the lawn, he asked for a 'completion bonus' because the grass was much taller than when we had originally agreed a price. He must think I'm a bit simple!
I might be simple, but I'm also Scottish! I wasnae' paying anymore!