Noel Edmonds - My Fake Diary

Monday, 27 February 2012

Recently I met with Arsene Wenger, the manager of Arsenal football club, at a showbiz event. At first he joked can he come on Deal or No Deal, he needs some quick money. I replied 'perhaps you should ask Harry Redknapp for a loan' and then asked him if he has a dog? Oh how we laughed.

Anyway, I told him about Cosmic Orderings, and he seemed very interested. He came back to my house, no funny business, but he was very interested in my beard. I noticed recently he signed Thiery Henry for a second spell at Arsenal - and this time Thierry had a beard. Thierry scored a few vital goals and now Arsene is texting me every day, asking questions about my beard, do I shampoo it? Do I trim it? Oh well, I had better humour him, if I need free tickets he could come in handy.