Dick Cheney - My Fake Diary

Saturday, 23 April 2016

Dear Diary-
I know all my demon followers believe I am dormant and with my bum ticker, not long for this world. Well, if they think they've seen the last of me, they are sorely mistaken!

I have arranged a few portable nuclear explosive devices I managed to secrete away while I was still the Veep to go off as soon as my heart stops. The devices are planted all around the world! When I go, it will be a sad day for all!
-Big Dick