David Cameron - My Fake Diary

Wednesday, 8 August 2012

I have launched a determined bid to kill off Boris Johnson's Tory leadership chances.

I've sent Foreign Secretary William Hague out to bat against the London Mayor, whose popularity has soared in recent weeks. With the Olympics also providing a so-called "Boris Bounce", I decided to act quickly.

Opening the attack yesterday Mr Hague said: "Boris is doing a great job as Mayor of London and people love him the more they see him. And that's great. But I think it is true to say, and certainly it is true for me, that I hope and believe that we are not looking for a long time for any new leader of the Conservative party."

That'll do for starters...