David Beckham - My Fake Diary
Saturday, 24 March 2012
Read in the paper the other day that Wayne Rooney fancies trying to do stand-up comedy.
Well, he's got plenty of self deprecating material...
Sleeping with granny hookers when he was a teenager;
Growing up in Liverpool;
Looking like Shrek;
Sleeping with a £1,200 a night high class hooker;
(Improvement on the granny grabbing)
Losing his hair in his twenties;
Having a hair transplant;
Watch out Russell Brand - you could have competition!