Cliff Richard - My Fake Diary

Thursday, 1 March 2012

So with yesterday being February 29th leap year, my neighbour Agnes knocked the door as usual, and I was dreading letting her down, knowing she wanted to propose (again). I let her down gently four years ago, but since then I have given interviews to the press about my 'live-in lodger'. I wonder if she cottoned on. Anyway, I made a point of not listening to the radio yesterday, so if the door bell rang I could hide behind the sofa and pretend to be out. Ten minutes later, police cars and ambulances turn up, sirens blazing. The silly old bat has called 999 because she couldn't get an answer, she thought I had popped me ol' cloggs.

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