London - (Associated Mess): Officers of the Metropolitan Police's Anti-Terrorist Branch have issued a statement naming London greasy-spoon cafe proprietor and serial self-publicist Terence Conran as their John Major number one head of UK organi...
Washington DC - (AssoCIAted Mess & ReUterus): In a desperate "bring 'em on" over-reaction to continued Senate fury over the White House's espousal of torture as a legitimate tool for fooling the American electorate, George W Bush t...
Washington, D.C. - Revelations flooded the (tender?) ears of members of a House subcommittee (and C-SPAN addicts) during a hearing to investigate Hewlett-Packard's spying activities. Not since Watergate have we witnessed covert operations like this.
Assured he would definitely lose his Republican majority in both the House and the Senate with the upcoming November election, President Bush canceled the election. Sighting that we're at war and the enemy wants to get us, Bush announced al-Qae...
London, UK - (Associated Mess): Impressed by the success of the novel way in which traditional Sunday collection plates at US churches and places of worship have been replaced by the Jesus ATMs, UK Prime Monster Tony Blair has decided to by-pass th...
London - (AssoCIAted Mess): The bungs-for peerages corrpution probe that saw the arrest last week of serial political sperm donor Sir Christopher Evans of Merlin Bioscams has quizzed the Prime Monster's offical gatekeeper Ruth Turner.
Washington DC - (AssoCIAted Mess): A Congressional reports into corruption activities of jailed Washington DC lobbyist Jack Abramoff has concluded that he acted as a rent boy for the Bush Administration which patently could not distinguish between b...
(LITTLE ROCK) - Little Rock police say that former President Clinton was arrested yesterday NOT because he single-handedly destroyed a Starbucks but because "after" trashing the place Clinton knowingly and willingly, still ticked the heck...
Washington DC - (Associated Mess): In a keynote address to the Senate yesterday, the head of the global organised crime cartel a.k.a. President George Bush Junior warned that he and the Bush Administration at Number 10 Downing Street in London were...
New York, New York - (Associated Mess): A new campaign to raise hundreds of millions of dollars has been launched by TheoCon self-mortification enthusiasts of the Opus Dei Foundation in a concerted effort to combat satirical sites that lampoon the...
Washington DC - (AssoCIAted Mess): The National Intelligence Estimate's eagerly-awaited report into the War Against Terra has concluded that the Bush Family Evil Empire has been a "cause celebre for jihadists" ever since the day when CI...
Manchester - (Associated Mess): Addressing a totally bewildered Labour Party conference, former US Presdident Bill Clinton told delegates that Prime Monster Tony Blair's government was in a 'stunning mess' and that he was doing all he co...
PETE Doherty has outlined his latest plan to prove to the world once and for all that his hell-raising ways are behind him - by applying to join Tetbury Upton Parish Council.
The European Commission has recommended that Israel be admitted to the European Union on Jan. 1 but attached unprecedented conditions, signaling there is still deep unease about the union's expansion into the Middle East and the potential econ...
Queensland , Australia. An excited and giddy Steve ‘Croc Hunter' Irwin returned to life Saturday after being dead since September 4th, 2006. Irwin, who passed away due to a freak accident while filming a segment for a documentary involving interact...
NEW YORK September 25 - After his recent speech apparently denigrating the qualities of soft materials which have a good handfeel and which can be made into fashionably shapeless 1960's style shirts and skirts, Popeye has declared that he was misunde...
Manchester - (Associated Mess): Those rift-healing, wholesome astrological rays of the autumn equinox must have been working overtime yesterday as the Prime Monster's wife Cherry Bush QC finally buried the hatchet in public.......in Chancellor Go...
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