Written by Jaggedone
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Topics: Murder, Jig Saw

Monday, 1 February 2010

image for Jigsaw Puzzle murderer admits he just couldn't fit the bits together!
The Jigsaw Puzzle Murderer's fav motive only his blood and brains are missing!

The infamous "Jigsaw Puzzle" murderer's failure to fit the pieces together of his last victim led to his conviction and after becoming so frustrated he dumped the bloody dismembered parts all over the UK.

The "Jigsaw Puzzle Murderer" was always fascinated with puzzles as a kid so when he entered the criminal fraternity he always offered to cut up dead bodies so he could puzzle them together again.

His last victim was too much of a puzzle.

After he "topped" him and cut him up he hoped he could put him together again and then bury him somewhere in the local woods.

But his victim was such a strange shape and his intestines were so deformed (booze) after the slicing up he just couldn't fit him together again, damn it!

The Jigsaw Puzzler got so frustrated and careless he dumped a leg here, arm there, head in the river, etc.

Well it was only a matter of time before they identified the victim, a lodger, and bobs your uncle!

Now safely locked up in a high-security Loony Bin, he still enjoys his favourite hobby, jigsaw puzzling and his latest accomplishment is a 4000 piece puzzle depicting the Auschwitz gas chamber genocides!

He's nearly finished it and said, "the best bit was puzzling the skulls together and striped suits!" What a Little Charmer!

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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