Obama Dispatches John Kerry and Jane Fonda to Lay Wreath for Osama; Patch Pakistan Relations!

Funny story written by Morse

Wednesday, 11 May 2011


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Kerry Predicts Success After Returning Home from Pakistan with Terrorist Agreement!

Following an outcry from the government of Pakistan over the stealth incursion into the country resulting in the demise of the World's Most Wanted Terrorist, President Barack Obama announced his intention to "make amends" by dispatching Viet Nam Era apologists John Kerry and Jane Fonda in a 'good will' gesture.

According to the State Department, the couple will be laying a wreath at the site of Osama's hideout, will be having a Security Meeting with members of the ISI, Pakistan's intelligence arm which supports the Taliban, and offering to supply an 'intact and operational' spare Apache Helicopter for "research" so the Pakistani's and the Chinese won't have to sort through the wreckage of the chopper blown up and left behind due to mechanical difficulties.

Jane Fonda is said to be 'over the moon' about the opportunity to reprise her Viet Nam era exploits when she visited Hanoi, got to sit on an anti-aircraft gun, and to interview, and later betray captured US airmen when she turned over notes they secretly passed her resulting in beatings, and at least one death.

According to the Pakistani Finance minister, if Kerry, member of the Senate Foreign Service Appeasement Committee, provides assurance to raise aid to $6Billion , Fonda will be permitted to 'get off ' while astride a nuclear missile, currently aimed 'somewhere in India."

CIA operatives in the country now say Kerry was the one who leaked the recent revelation of the real name of the CIA's head of station in the country, which followed on the heels of VP Joe Biden who congratulated the entire Seal Team 6 by name on Chris Matthews
"Hairball" on CNBC while taking complete credit for masterminding the mission.

The President's mission brings up painful memories for Viet Nam Vets, still smarting over Fonda's visit to Hanoi while thousands suffered and died in the jungle.

And Navy vets still remember Kerry getting his tour cut short after receiving three (3) Purple Hearts, one self inflicted, and one still debated, returning home to join the Peace Movement and throwing his medals away during a dope and sex rally in Washington.

Despite marrying the wealthy divorcee of the Heinz Ketchup fortune, Kerry still mistakes Ketchup for the real Blood being spilled to support the life style to which he's become so comfortably accustomed.

President Obama recently indicated that Kerry is on 'the short list' to replace Hillary Clinton as Secretary of State, news which thrilled North Korea, Syria, Libya, Cuba, and the Council of Ministers in Brussels.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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