Written by Jalapenoman

Thursday, 20 October 2005

image for Wilma to Strike Cuba With Vengeance
Wilma Flintstone is threatening to yell up a storm when she finds her husband.

(AP) Wilma Flintstone, upset at the latest shenanigans of her husband Fred, will land in Cuba today; needless to say, she's mad. "That idiot husband of mine and his friend Barney Rubble came down here with his Loyal Order of Water Buffalo brothers to get cigars and some sun and ogle the pretty girls on the beach. He apparently forgot about the new cereal commercial he is supposed to film. When I get ahold of him...."

The Flintstones, longtime residents of Bedrock, have a young daughter named Pebbles. Fred is currently employed at a rock quarry by Mr. Slate, but actually makes more money manufacturing and advertising his breakfast cereals (Fruitty and Cocoa Pebbles). Barney Rubble and his wife Betty have one son, the same age as Pebbles, named Bamm Bamm. They live next door to the Flintstones.

When asked how she intends to find her husband in a city and country where she does not know the language, Wilma said that "I brought our pet, DIno. He has a great nose at sniffing out trouble. Fred is always around food and trouble. When I find someplace that sells Bronto Burgers, I can bet that my husband has already been there."

Wilma claimed that her trip was in no way politically motivated. She has no interest in meeting with or talking to Fidel Castro. She also has no opinion on the little boy who was court ordered back to Cuba a few years ago or on fifteen year old Cuban baseball players who pretend to be twelve to play in the Little League World Series. "I really don't know anything about the country except that Desi Arnez came from here."

Wilma was asked who was watching her daughter while she was in Havanna. "Pebbles is staying with Betty. She and Bamm Bamm just love playing together. My little girl is well taken care of. Now, I'm going to take care of my husband!"

When asked if she planned to leave the country before the arrival of Hurricane Wilma, Mrs. Flintstone said that "this island hasn't seen any fury or storm until they see what happens when I get ahold of my husband!"

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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Topics: Strike, water

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