Bangalore Herald, Bangalore, India: Indian authorities have decided enough is enough! The traffic in India's major cities is total madness and mayhem and Indian drivers refuse to obey anybody.
The police stand on the corners, crossings, traffic lights, etc, and are forced to watch the total chaos as drivers of all vehicles, including rickshaws fly by in all directions going the same way?
Traffic Authority managers all over India have been brainstorming the problem and have come up with a brilliant solution:
The only thing able to stop the traffic is the "Holy Cow", Indian drivers respect the cow so much they stop and let them cross the roads, people on the other hand become their targets.
"Holy Cows" are now being trained to stand at major crossings, junctions, traffic lights, corners, etc, to regulate the traffic with their "Holy Men" assisting whilst begging.
The "Holy Cows" are being taught to cross the junctions at regular intervals (depending of the volumes of traffic), the traffic halts and people are allowed to cross in safety.
Zebra-crossings (they're African?) have proven useless because Indians only believe in the "Holy Cow"
Tests have proven particularly successful in Bangalore where trials have been made, the fatality rate of humans has dropped significantly, only problem is, where do they put them all, humans I mean!