Sexy alleged Russian ginger spy, Anna Chapman, arrested last week on espionage charges, was last night presented with a warrant by leading sportscaster ESBN.
ESBN are aggrieved that the Russian hotty may be the individual responsible for ruining the South Africa soccer World Cup for millions of Americans and Europeans, by being involved in the manufacture, distribution and sales of the dreaded vuvuzela.
ESBN lawyers stated that the sports station had been relying on millions of Americans to tune into their World Cup coverage, hoping that they'd take an interest in the beautiful game.
However, sports fans in the USA and Europe complained that the constant buzzing of the vuvuzelas during games was so annoying that many viewers changed channels.
Private investigations have revealed that the vuvuzelas - a kind of plastic trumpet which makes a really annoying droning sound - were for the most part manufactured by Russian financed corporations. With her un-American activities, Anna Chapman emerged as a prime suspect in the vuvuzela scandal "because she wanted to eff up the World Cup for American and European fans by making every game sound like it was being played in a beehive," according to a source.
It is thought that the Russians' failure to qualify for the world's most prestigeous sporting extravaganza lay behind the vuvuzela conspiracy.
Anna Chapman has so far declined to comment - mainly because I haven't asked her to.
More as we get it.