Mexican Presidential Candidate Feared Kidnapped, Killed, and Stuffed in Tortilla on Arizona Border!

Written by Morse

Sunday, 16 May 2010

image for Mexican Presidential Candidate Feared Kidnapped, Killed, and Stuffed in Tortilla on Arizona Border!
Is This Remains of Missing Mexican Politician? Obama: Don't Ask, Don't Tell!"

It appears that a former Mexican Presidential Candidate might have become the 22,001 murder victim of warring drug cartels since 2006 as parts of a dismembered corpse has been found stuffed in a tortilla and left just across the border from Arizona as a warning against trying to curtail crime in the state.

Mexican officials say it might take weeks to confirm the identity of the body parts mixed with lettuce and jalopeano peppers, but are certain they will get to the bottom of the atrocity. So far murder clearance rates in Mexico are 'zero', but excused by US Attorney General Eric Holder as "understandable due to the number of overwhelming deaths. Luckily, they're just gang members and not part of the general population of Arizona Tourists."

Holder, who says he has not 'had time' to review Arizona's 10 page new law concerning 'illegal immigrants', but denounced it anyway, dismissed Arizona becoming the 'kidnap capital of the world', and the scene of daylight shootouts declaring, "Hey, didn't any of you people see 'Tombstone' or 'Shoot out at the O.K. Corral? Arizona has a long history of violence. They need to
just 'get over it."

Massachusetts Attorney General Martha Coakley, the recent winner of "World's Worst Political Campaign" after Scott Brown's overwhelming victory for Ted "Gin Gimlet" Kennedy's seat, backed Massachusetts stance on illegal immigration, and Boston as a Sanctuary City, saying on national TV, "technically, it's not ILLEGAL to be ILLEGAL in Massachusetts!"

Coakley was merely confirming white house opinion, as Obama's aunt is still living high off the taxpayer money in Boston after being ordered deported 4 years ago, and her recent 25th court appearance documents were sealed and apparently stored with a host of other Obama documents declared 'off limits' by the Regime's legal staff.

Homeland Security Director Janet Napitalano has been unavailable for comment concerning the state she used to govern, with her staff saying she was participating in a woman's traveling soft ball team which included switch hitter Elana Kagan, Obama's newest Pant Suit nominee for the Supreme Court. Napitalano, who plays shortstop, has not fielded a tough question or made a meaningful gesture concerning the increasing violence along the SE border states, or against continued attacks by Muslim Terrorists bent on destroying the US.

She is however, strongly in favor of installing urinals in the ladies' restrooms in all Federal Buildings as a measure to support 'human rights' as practiced in the European Union with other 'Political Correctness' concerns to become law 'soon' according to Holder, Reid, and Pelosi.

As Obama quipped on his blog "West Wing Week", "these tea baggers are getting all wee wee'd up about nothing...just because a few Mexicans are being decapitated, doesn't mean we have to lose our head about it!"

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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