Obama Goes 'Ape Shit', Commissions Deeper, Darker, Safer Bunker under Camp David as Pressures Mount!

Funny story written by Morse

Friday, 7 May 2010


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image for Obama Goes 'Ape Shit', Commissions Deeper, Darker, Safer Bunker under Camp David as Pressures Mount!
Obama Aid Peeks Out from Bunker to Get Update on World Events While Barry Hangs Out Underground!

President Barry Hussein Obama, a foreigner who never really understood the history and character of America, has further isolated himself from the American Public by commissioning a deeper bunker under Camp David where he expects to ride out the coming months until the mid term elections in November.

Claiming 'The Enemy is at the Gates', Obama has gone to German Archives and commissioned the reproduction of Hitler's underground hideaway, as he gathers his faithful around him, anticipating the upcoming elections, but still promising "secret weapons' to turn the tide.

Surrounded by Minister of Propaganda Robert Gibbs, Chief of Staff Rahm Emanuel, loyal sexual surrogate Valerie Jarrett, Attorney General Eric Holder placed in charge of the 'final solution' on terrorists, and his trained attack Portuguese Water Dog, Bo, Obama claims he will be able to rally the faithful to his party despite overwhelming losses in recent months both in the failed US economy and the World Field of encroaching socialism.

Critics have likened Obama to a turtle under attack, the bigger the threat, the more he retreats into his shell, only lashing out sporadically to attack others when their back is turned.

For his inaction in the recent US Gulf Oil crisis, to the latest Islamic Terrorist attempt which his Home Land Security appointee labeled 'an isolated incident,' to his avoidance of leadership in the breakdown of border security, the Commander in Chief, has refused to act, show leadership, and quite frankly appears disconnected to everyday events.

Today's events in the wildly fluctuating stock market has been traced to insider trading in the blind trusts of Obama, Harry Reid, Nancy Pelosi, and most of the surviving Kennedy family.

Monetary tracking involving multiple wire transfers after the market dropped
1000 points within 20 minutes, shows hedge funds where Joe Biden's family, Al Gore and George Soros had intimate connections, sold the American Economy short, moved the proceeds into Norwegian Krona, and transferred the funds to several Argentinean Banks.

According to inside reports from the White House, most of the 3650 portraits of Obama have been removed from the wall, crated, and are awaiting pickup at the Baltimore shipyard by a Trident submarine for transshipment to Paraguay, with a brief stop in Caracas.

All press visits to the White House have been curtailed, there is a news black out in effect, and the Chicago National Guard has been trucked in to secure the Perimeter of Pennsylvania Avenue.

All gasoline and liquor sales have been banned in the Nation's Capitol, and a report from Fox news said the Resolution Desk was seen for sale on Ebay along with Obama autographed basketballs, 5 lbs of sweet potatoes grown and autographed by Michelle Obama, and the original document of the Constitution of the United States where the current custodian said 'it was no longer needed as it had outgrown it's usefulness.'

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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