Police:Dad ran over "Iraqi-ized" daughter

Funny story written by Alexandria177

Thursday, 22 October 2009

image for Police:Dad ran over "Iraqi-ized" daughter
Once you go Iraqi, you never go backy.

Peyoriah, Iraq - Police in a Baghdad suburb are looking for a man suspected of running down his daughter because she was becoming too "Iraqi-ized" and was not living according to their traditional American values.

Police say 48-year-old Phil Hollis of Tikrit allegedly ran his daughter down Tuesday at a parking lot in Peyoriah.

The victim, 20-year-old Amber Hollis of Sadr City, remains hospitalized with life-threatening injuries.

A second woman, 43-year-old Jennifer McKean, also of Sadr City, suffered non-life threatening injuries. Police say the women are roommates.

Police spokesman Mahmoud Almakeh said family and friends of the victims told detectives that the father had threatened his daughter because of her lifestyle.

"Ever since we have come to this cesspit of propriety and decency, I've watched my daughter change.", Phil used to complain. "She has shunned TV and mini-skirts for prayer meetings and burkas. I even heard her tell that roommate of her's that she was going to 'save herself till marriage'! Imagine, my own daughter, acting like some Muslim with goals that extend beyond getting high on the weekend!"

Family members confirm that Amber had indeed changed. No alcohol, no drugs, no running around with random guys, and no television or interest in movies. "All she wanted to do was read and study at our college", said the roommate. "And maybe meet a nice young man at church. It drove her father crazy."

Police say such is not uncommon, and many Americans are becoming frustrated at watching their children take on Iraqi values. They expect to have Phil in custody soon.

Author's note: The first part of this was deliberately copied from the MSNBC news article, but it "mirrors" it, making everything opposite. After that, all the words are mine.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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