Twatter: New Social Networking sensation

Funny story written by jeremy griffiths

Thursday, 3 September 2009


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"TWATTER" one world-nuclear family

It's known as "Twatter" the latest internet sensation. Unashmedly based on the old hat "Twitter", the site boasts a membership of 20 billion already, and growing at half a million a day.

As founders Daniel Althat and Sean Bag o'Chips explained, "We could see that other sites were getting way too serious man, I mean, who wants to get news 'n stuff when all people want is total bollocks?" O'chips continued " Our site is like totally multinational and multicultural, 'cus like, bollocks is cock in any language"

Users or "Twats" spew out such meaningless twaddle that it is eqally incomprehensible in any language.

The site has won plaudits from the UN for it's contribution to world understanding and peace. Isralies, Arabs, Americans, have all enthusiastically embraced the concept of being "Twats" Americans have as usual rapidly become the world's biggest "Twats"

Early adopters include Stephen Fry, one of the biggest twats,and of course H.R.H.Prince Charles, whose natural rantings have long been extremely Twattish, indeed his first contribution started "I was born to be a Twat......."

Althat and Bag o'chips are well on their way to their first billion dollars, having sold 10% of the company to Ebay, who are renowned for buying up any old tat for ludicrous sums.

A possibly serious challenge to the term "Twat" has recently been settled with the Liverpool F.C Supporters club, whose claim that they had been "Twatting Arsenal supporters for at least 100 years" had a strong chance of being upheld by the European Court for human rights.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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