Kim Jong, Ill

Funny story written by Monkey Woods

Wednesday, 10 September 2008

image for Kim Jong, Ill
She doesn't look very well, does she?

There was a media frenzy this morning, with journalists from all over the world clamouring for information, when it was announced that North Korean porn star, Kim Jong, was ill.

Jong is a leading figure in Asian porn, and has starred in several movies, the most notable of which, have been Blow You Up, 2005's Suck On This, and her latest blockbuster Coming (To Get You).

She also refused the lead in US film Deathwish 2007.

Authorities in North Korea have described the reports of Miss Jong's ill-health as "absorute lubbish" and "worthress plopaganda".

North Korea has a 'strained' relationship with the rest of the world, being suspicious of the West, and little is known about what goes on inside its borders. Its feelings of loneliness and isolation are further exacerbated by Pyongyang's insistence on pursuing an unmonitored Nuclear programme.

Its porn industry is excellent, though, apparently.

The rumours that Kim Jong was not well, originated in the South Korean newspaper The Seoul Morning Dong, which, in last night's edition, ran the scaremongering headline Kim Jong Il - Missing From 60th Anniversary Celebrations.

The sexy star was present at both the 50th and 55th anniversaries, and experts have said it is "worrying" that she was not present yesterday. A sudden demise in her health could spell a period of further instability in the region, and implications for the wider world are dire.

It just remains for us at to send our own wishes for a speedy recovery to Kim Jong, and hope that she's not Il for much longer.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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