JIANGXI PROVINCE, CHINA - "A fool and his penis are soon parted." It was a lesson to be learned the hard way for local man Mi No Do, as the gambling addict wagered, and lost, his family's most prized possession - a preserved tiger penis - in the annual Jiangxi Province Cockfighting Championship.
"This is terrible," said a dejected Mi, who received even more bad news when he was informed that his beloved bantam sustained a fatal injury in its opening match. "I can't believe I lost both my penis and my cock on the same day."
The loss of the prized aphrodisiac was only the latest in a string of gambling mishaps which resulted in the forfeiture of several of Mr. Do's most prized possessions, including his blue-veined python, his dirty balls, and the family jewels.
"I think I have finally learned my lesson," said a humbled Mi. "No more gambling. It has cost me so much. I have lost my basketballs signed by Yao Ming, my pet snake, and my wife's jade necklace, not to mention my beef rod, my piccolo, or my stick-and bangers."
Fortunately for Mi, there is consolation to be found in the comfort of family.
"Yes, gambling has cost me dearly," he said, hugging his only son. "Thankfully though, I will always have my little Wang."