In recent spoof news, The Spoof writer known as Dr. Edward Maxwell has been diagnosed with split personalities. When Dr. Maxwell's stories seemed to bounce from good to bad, personal rant to real news, the staff of TheSpoof.com became wary.
"We were really curious, because at first he wasn't writing anything, then suddenly stories started popping up. On top of that he was all against turd stories, then wrote one that is still in circulation today. Then his stories got really good after being so bad for so long. Then they started to go down hill. Then he had some really good, important stories, then he just started ranting and attacking the other writers. I speak for everyone involved when I say we were very curious," states editor Mark Lowton.
"One of the reasons we think he might be schizophrenic, is because his forum posts vary as well. One minute he loves you the next he hates you. He has even been complimenting some of the writers he normally slams," writer Tiki Murphy has stated.
In order to help the Doc, and several other writers, Mr. Lowton has asked a psychiatrist friend of his to come in and do an evaluation on his staff.
Dr. Pankerman releases his findings,"It is my opinion that none of the staff is particularly normal. Which is what makes them such fine writers. You can't have to good of a grip on reality and do what they do. It's the sacrifice they make to bring us up to the minute news. Yes, Dr. Maxwell does suffer from schizophrenia, as do some of the other writers. Tiki Murphy is another of the schizophrenic writers. She seems to suffer from delusions of grandeur as well. In my humble opinion these fine writers are just as they should be. A little off the wall and a lot nuts."
Mr. Lowton is greatly relieved with the findings of Dr. Pankerman. The Spoof offices will not have to close and be restaffed.
Let us honor this great team of writers for sacrificing their sanity to give you the best news stories possible.
The Spoof, I salute you.
