United Nations Building, New York (IPP) - An angel appeared before the United Nation's meeting of the General Assembly Wednesday after lunch.
He had arrived by taxi and was dressed in a standard looking "tree piece suit" as the say in New York and at first hardly anyone had paid any attention to the man.
The UN's electronic translation unit seemed to suddenly go dead and it was at this time that the members looked towards the podium and saw a bright light there that forced them to put on their sunglasses. Standing before them was not a man in a three piece suit but rather a full blown spiritual being bathed in a brilliant and shimmering light.
The crowd fell silent and fear was seen in many of the faces assembled there. Some tried to exit to no avail as the doors were locked tight.
The angel spoke and everyone could clearly understand what was being said despite the fact that the members of the crowd were separated by over 100 languages.
The angel told them that his name is Naybob and that he had come with a warning. He told them that the last true prophet was named John. He said anyone claiming to be a prophet after that time was a false prophet and that includes EVERYONE after John - PERIOD. He told the crowd that man was given the freedom of choice in what he believed in but reminded them that the universe is a strange and mysterious place so they can go ahead and doubt if that was their choice but just because they did not think it was not so did not mean that it was not.
Naybob told the crowd that there are no 70 odd virgins waiting for anyone anywhere and that the Mormonic way was the moronic way. He chided Christians for making a literal interpretation of everything mentioned in the bible and said that man, not God, wrote the bible. Naybob explained that little stories called parables were simply used to illustrate moral truths to simple folks.
The angel told the crowd that time was running out if for no other reason than that of the long list of abuses that mankind had committed against God's beautiful creations that God had thrown into motion via the big bang and evolution.
He said that the only thing God hates more than man's inhumanity to man and violence is hypocrisy. He told them that to be a Christian is to be Christ-like in one's behavior and that Christ healed the sick, comforted the grieving, washed the feet of the weary traveller, fed the hungry, and did not get involved in politics nor put bumper stickers championing causes not listed in the bible on his possessions.
Near the end of his speech he told them that "Thou shall not kill" applies to governments as well as to the people and that an eye for an eye simply meant "let the punishment fit the crime". You people are punishment happy and are much too willing to dole out excessive sentences for trivial offenses.
The last thing he said was, "The Earth and your bodies are manifestations of God's temple...clean up your act and remember that blessed are the peace makers for THEY shall inheret the Earth".
He then vanished before their unbelieving eyes.
One observer, a janitor, said to another man standing near him, "Did you notice that he had a New Joisey accent?" The other guy who was from New York said, "Nahhh, sounded to me like he was from Brooklyn."
