Clinton-Bin Laden Wedding Jubilee: Britney Spears, Janet Jackson's Nipple No-Shows

Funny story written by Leanna Lawrence McCormick

Thursday, 11 March 2004

Orlando, FL- Two cultures blended beautifully today in a touching ceremony joining Osama Bin Laden and Chelsea Clinton in holy matrimony.

The extravaganza, broadcast live worldwide over NBC, BBC, and Al Jazeera, attracted such notable guests as President and Mrs. George W. Bush, Alan Greenspan, British Prime Minister Tony Blair, director George Lucas, and Andy Dick, to name just a few. The wedding and reception took place in the Magic Kingdom, Walt Disney World Resort, Orlando, Florida.

The bride wore a floor length sequined white Vera Wang gown, and carried ivory calla lillies. Her maid of honor and best friend, Monica Lewinsky, wore a blue dress.

The groom and his best man, Saddam Hussein, wore matching black Ralph Lauren tuxedos. In agreement with Disney, both men wore black mouse ears. (Bin Laden refused to be photographed with the ears, which he claimed made him look too 'American.')

Pope John Paul II performed the double-ring ceremony. In response to criticism that neither the bride nor the groom is Catholic, the Pope responded, "Huh?"

Bill Clinton walked his daughter down the aisle to "All You Need is Love," performed by Paul McCartney and Michael Jackson.

The happy couple plans to honeymoon in Guantanamo Bay, Cuba, before making their home in a cave in Afghanistan.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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