People Disgusted With Woman Who Put Bananas On Her Head

Funny story written by Monkey Woods

Friday, 13 November 2020

image for People Disgusted With Woman Who Put Bananas On Her Head
The lady behind her seems as if she just can't bear to look

A woman who put a large quantity of bananas on her head and started to walk around the streets with them, has come in for criticism from other members of the public, who said that her behavior was "unnecessary" and "unbecoming".

The incident happened in the Nigerian capital of Lagos last week, when a local woman, Dottie Smith, decided to go out for a stroll with a shitload of the crescent-shaped yellow fruit balanced atop her bonce.

Others gaped at this sight, unaware that Dottie grows bananas in her back garden, and often sells them to friends and neighbors for a price that is lower than the prices in the local market.

One woman, Stella Python, said:

"I think it's a disgrace that, in this day and age, and what with the virus going around, and everything, she's still out selling those bananas. She should be ashamed of herself!"

Another, Alice Grogg, cackled:

"Just look at her! Bananas! She bloody well is bananas! Deary, deary me!"

Banana expert, Michael Goodluck, was livid. He said:

"Why, that's crazy! What on earth is she playing at? Bananas should be left on the tree until they are properly ripe. Picking them at this early stage, whilst they are still green, could have a serious impact upon her ability to offload them to discerning customers who are, most likely, familiar with the banana-growing procedure."

But Dottie said:

"Look, it's MY business where I put my bananas, and I'll put them wherever I see fit, thank you very kindly!"

And she waddled off, taking her big head, boxer's nose, and 'chisel chin' with her.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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