Man's Glasses Are Now Being Held Together By A Rubber Band

Written by Monkey Woods

Tuesday, 7 April 2020

image for Man's Glasses Are Now Being Held Together By A Rubber Band
The glasses, with a wonderful backdrop of that din-din from last night, remember?

A man whose glasses have broken, but who is unable to leave his home because he is observing the current 'lockdown rules' imposed by the government, has told how he has, 'in the short term', temporarily resolved the problem by using a rubber band to hold his spectacles together.

Moys Kenwood, 56, bought the glasses, along with three other identical pairs, in Bangkok, in 2016. They cost only 40 baht each, so he stocked-up.

Now, however, the last pair of that foursome have felt the test of time, and yesterday saw the left-side frame crack, leaving the lens perched precariously.

To remedy this, he had his wife hold the spectacles whilst he used a cigarette lighter to melt the broken part of the frame sufficiently, so that it might be 'melded' together, but this was in vain.

Plus, he scorched part of the lens.

He ruefully sat looking at his glasses, and, as he did, he spied a rubber band, a solitary rubber band, and, as it turned out, a Providential Rubber Band of Fate, just lying on the floor, and his dimwitted brain moved up a gear.

He secured the lens within the frame, and, using a double loop, fastened the rubber band around the broken green plastic frame in such a way, that, to all intents and purposes the glasses were as good as new.

Well, almost.

Early reports from this morning, are that the glasses had a comfortable night, and appear to be doing well. The rubber band is still in place, and, with luck, the spectacles will continue to give years of good service, until they are physically unable to hold together any longer, and become dust.

At that far-off point in time, he'll have to 'put his hand in his pocket' once again, and buy some more.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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