Eyesight failing? There's an app for that

Funny story written by IainB

Thursday, 24 January 2013

image for Eyesight failing? There's an app for that

Opticians have long been the only place you can go to when you realise that the reason you keep bumping in to stuff is that you need glasses. Normally, most people continue to bump into stuff rather than get glasses for vanity reasons. Some continue to bump into stuff because they cannot see their way to an opticians.

Help is now at hand for this latter group, in the shape of iEye.

"It turns out I've been blind for years," said App World! editor, Mac Buck.

The new app replaces a visit to the opticians by repeating all of the tests that an optician performs.

"By holding the camera up to your eye, the applelet examines the retina," said Buck. "It gives out instructions like look up, blink, and the like. There are even a choice of voices, I chose the Dominatrix."

By holding the screen one inch from eyes, the applelet then performs a series of sight tests, using the iPhone's inbuilt voice recognition software to see how far down the eye chart people can look.

"The eye chart is very clever," said Buck. "When you look at the screen, it looks like it's fifteen feet away!"

Once the examination is complete, the app creates a prescription and takes you to the glasses store.

"It even uses a picture of you," said Buck, "showing you what you look like in each of the frames. Brilliant. I'm still not ordering a pair. I prefer to bump into stuff than look like a geek."

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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