In a new move intended to save the planet, member states of The United Nations have met and decided to ban all air travel henceforth.
This will have a few repercussions for us all and might take a bit of getting used to.
Secretary General of the UN, Des Lynam, said:
"Something had to be done or we were all off to hell in a handcart. Anybody currently finding themselves in the wrong country, say, as a result of holidays or business; then tough shit! Not unless they are good swimmers.
But let's look at the positives here. War will be a thing of the past and the British seaside holiday will be booming again in no time"
The new measures will be put in place for a trial period of two days and will be reviewed after that.
Prime Minister, Tony Blair, asked:
"Where exactly does this leave me? I was due to piss off on another freebie to Italy tomorrow and now I'll have to go to bloody Blackpool and pay for the privilege too!"
