Written by Monkey Woods

Wednesday, 11 April 2018

image for Man Felt Cheated Over Dating Site Promise
"Meet her now"

A man who clicked on a link to a dating site in order to meet a girl he had seen in an advert, claimed today that he felt 'cheated' when he didn't get to meet the girl, even though a caption told him: "meet her now''.

The man - whose identity has been protected, and shall be known here only as 'MK' - saw the advertisement placed by a company called dating.com on satirical news website TheSpoof.com, and quickly hit the link, hoping to meet the girl of his dreams, an Asian-looking girl with long, tawny, brown hair, who smiled at him as if she wanted an intense physical relationship.

"When I pressed that key on my keyboard, I thought that my dream girl would be waiting for me, and would appear inside the next microsecond for me to arrange a date with her, a date which would lead, hopefully, to massive sex."

But what happened next was beyond a joke, said MK:

"There was an online form that needed completing with all my personal details - private stuff, you know? The sort of thing that leaves you open to abuse - and worse, fraud - if it gets into the wrong hands."

MK says that, instead of the sexy Asian girl, pictures of other women appeared on his screen, and some of them weren't up to much.

"One of them looked like a Bulgarian shotputter. Another looked as if she'd had a hard life mending ship's nets. The third one I suspected of being able to breathe fire."

There has been a recent upsurge in the number of people who say they are now fearful of providing too much personal information online, in the aftermath of the Facebook/Cambridge Analytica scandal involving the 'harvesting' and sharing of the personal data of up to 57 million people.

MK said:

"It's not that. I don't care what those algorithms know about me. Nah, it's just that I feel a bit cheated that I didn't get to meet my dream girl like they said I would., and that they tried to fob me off with munters."

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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