Ex-Girlfriend Probably Just Marrying That Guy to Make You Jealous

Written by rvler9201

Tuesday, 25 October 2016

ASHBURN, VA--While browsing Facebook Tuesday, area man Robbie Harrison stumbled upon the account of ex-girlfriend Carrie Close, replete with postings concerning her wedding next April. After careful consideration, Harrison concluded that Close, with whom he broke up four years ago, had only gotten engaged in order to make Harrison jealous, in an underhanded ploy to gain his attention and eventually win his affections once more.

"Yeah, look at that, posting all those photos in the hope that I'll get super jealous and call or text her. So pathetic," reporters overheard Harrison saying. "Gotta do better than that, Carrie. This is just like when you tried sleeping with my roommate when we broke up. Not gonna work on me."

Sources close to Harrison speculate that the 27-year-old will have a similar reaction next November when Close and her fiancé announce they are expecting their first child.

At press, Close had decided to leave Harrison off the guest list.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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