White House Apocalyptic Announcement

Funny story written by Auntie Matter

Monday, 8 December 2014

image for White House Apocalyptic Announcement
Somewhere Over the Rainbow.... "Horus".

Press Secretary for President Obama's administration, Karl Von Mitty Munchausen announced today to at gathering of journalists and reporters invited to a White House tickets-only news conference the following:

"General Martin Dempsey, chairman of the Joint Chiefs of Staff, wishes you all to know, that for the security of the United States our scientists have developed, thanks to years of selfless devotion by our associates at the Hadron Collider in Switzerland, a nuclear bomb capable of blowing the entire planet to smithereens. This bomb is now in place on the moon.

Our President has a direct phone link to our personnel in the Lunar Station we have established there. We have named the bomb "Horus".

Naturally, these projects have been kept top secret; and our heartiest thanks to the Freemasons and the media empires they run for keeping it so. The bomb is there, not, let us stress, as a threat to the world, but as a reminder to all those who aspire to challenging the New World Order soon to be put in place, that it's a case of ... "get with the program or else!". I suppose you would be tempted to call that a "threat"... but it not meant as such.

President Obama has issued the following statement: "We owe our deepest gratitude to the Pentagon and our nuclear scientists for creating this device. It will ensure lasting peace on our planet and protect democracy forever. A Happy Christmas to you all."

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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