Don't Do Stupid Sh*t party steps forward to challenge duopoly

Funny story written by joseph k winter

Saturday, 5 July 2014

image for Don't Do Stupid Sh*t party steps forward to challenge duopoly
Global munitions companies will be confined here to do business with and destroy each other

The new DDSS party, inspired direct from President Obama's name for his foreign policy, the "Don't Do Stupid Sh*t" policy, is set for a two year run to take the Presidency.

It emphasizes program, not personality. A founding principle begins: "We hold this stupid sh*t to be self-evident (followed by examples) . . . "

The DDSS office has explained it also supports a global run, by which SS is detected right away by everybody across the world, followed by reversals to a better turd world.

The turd world, the really good sh*t, these are beloved expressions. We can't change reality. There is good sh*t, there is bad sh*t.

For example, a government's stealing into a foreign territory that dangles like a ripe plum, abetting illegal overthrow of the current president to send him fleeing, helping to repress protest of this action in the east of this country, and all the while pumping to JQ Public this behavior is defense against Russia--this is a finely sifted and studied SS ("stupid sh*t").

Supplying money and weaponry into a rabid scene with militias running rampant and a civil war, pushing those goodies toward the very elements which then leak to the south and into Iraq to come back and attack the very same government that supplied it--more "stupid sh*t."

The DDSS press secretary continued:

Under serious consideration at this time is the purchase of a large swath of territory, preferably an island, on which to re-locate all munitions factories of the globe.

They would remain entirely insulated and confined to their island in doing business with and destroying each other.

An immediate, flat, fifty percent tax on the top one percent of American wealth would bring at least 70 billion into the public coffers.

As to campaigning development of the "Don't Do Stupid Sh*t" party, add a fist pump, plus a little hop, a dance.

Asked to evaluate the chances for this new DDSS party to succeed, GOP Speaker of the House John Boehner responded:

"We all know who is responsible for this particular SS, and that it's coming from not far away from here in that large white structure over there. . . "

And Josh Earnest is saying:

"The President's current policy is exactly this very same don't do stupid sh*t idea, and we've had to take corrective action all along for what happened due to 2003. Our sh*t is superior sh*t . . . "

And The New York Times is saying:

"Of course merde is the nature of all things, probably the universe, by which we are obliged to be architects and developers of that particular element--not merely muckrakers . . ."

And the DDSS party is saying:

"We are all, all of us, the ordinaries, experts in not merely muckraking but sorting, analysing, weighing, sifting all manner of things feculent, let's just take the last few years, regarding what has trickled down . . ."

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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