Pope resigns as God is disproved

Funny story written by IainB

Saturday, 15 February 2014

image for Pope resigns as God is disproved
If the priesthood can be so heinous without being struck down, where is God?

"It's the end of the Catholic church," the current Pope has admitted, after a water tight logic disproved the existence of a Christian God.

After recent trials saw several priests convicted of child abuse, one lawyer summed up at the end with a phrase that has resonated through all of the various splinter groups of Christianity. From Catholics to Greek Orthodox, from Protestant to Jehovah's Witnesses.

"How can there be a just and righteous god in Heaven that lets his own representatives on Earth perform such heinous and evil acts upon the innocent without immediate and devastating repercussions?" asked lawyer Kevin Johnson at the end of a trial of Father Godfrey Godwin, one of the priests arrested, tried and convicted of systematically and systemically abusing the children entrusted with him.

Johnson's summation has had repercussions far beyond the courtroom as millions of Christians across the world came to terms with what Johnson had said, and what it meant for their faith.

"It's terrible," said one Kansas formerly regular church-goer, Gladys Ivanovic. "If there is a God, and he hasn't struck down those that profess to work for him, then he must support child abuse. And I for one cannot worship a god that believes child abuse is okay. Where is the God that destroyed Sodom, that cleansed the earth?"

With millions leaving the Christian faith, and even the UN questioning the Catholic church for not dealing with it's own, preferring to cover up rather than condemn the actions of a large number of it's senior members, Pope Francis has joined Pope Benedict in Papal retreat announcing the end of the Catholic church.

The Vatican will be absorbed into Rome, and henceforth ceases to be a sovereign state, and the Swiss guard may finally return to Switzerland.

As he was boarding a plane for the Papal retreat, Francis turned to waiting masses, and said "Sorry."

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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